Before the four-hour rehearsal begins, Voices of the Class stage manager Dorothy Kohlligian can be observed distributing signs, Monty-Python-style coconuts and other props, while director Matthew Marcus announces that an obviously misshapen “three-cornered hat needs maintenance.” On the other side of the auditorium, actors discuss line readings while lights flicker and random reverberations are emitted from the speakers as technical directors experiment with sound. Dropping in on the pre-show alone was enough to prepare me for a night of side-splitting laughter.
While laughing to the point of oxygen-deprivation during one of the many ingenious skits that makes up Voices of the Class, it would not be surprising for one to wonder — “Who on Earth comes up with this stuff?” Personally, I had difficulty believing that almost all the skits had been based on admission essays from fellow first-year students.
That’s right, 2012. The Office of Undergraduate Admissions has relinquished anywhere from 50 to 70 of the most interesting and unique admissions essays to a group of 13 actors and actresses. During the summer, these essays were read and reworked in preparation for the actors’ arrival on Grounds a week before classes started. The actors then worked to turn the essays into skits of comedic genius, finally producing a new and unique show, the 2005 version of which The Washington Post called “funny and illuminating” in a rather lengthy article.
Not all the skits, however, are essay-based. Interspersed are gems that poke fun at everything first-year, from Grounds for Discussion to “dramatic reenactments” of how certain University traditions (or “staples”) got their start. Additionally, characters such as Tommy J., Edgar Allen Poe and the guy who wants to get in the Sisterhood’s pants will become instant classics.
Conversely, there are components of Voices that are serious in nature. Powerful and intense skits and monologues are scattered throughout, along with skits that have elements of both humor and gravity. Artistic director and actress Leah Bernick emphasizes the importance of the proper balance between the sad, the serious and the funny. Furthermore, the actors and staff must always be on guard for any crossings of the boundary between what is funny and what could be offensive.
“Our biggest reason is to entertain,” assures Bernick, “but we have to handle it [our humor] delicately.”
This constant vigilance is only one minuscule example of the work, dedication and precision that has gone into this production every year since 1999. The actors read the essays, write and constantly revise the skits, rehearse for hours on end, buy and make props, carry out technical work and ultimately perform for sold-out chemistry auditoriums. As actress Allison DeBlois reflects, “[Voices] is pretty much the only student theater production that you get to write and perform yourself. You get to be involved in the whole process from the beginning.”
Voices of the Class is a must-see event, and I truly believe it is far on its way in establishing itself as a prominent “staple at the University of Virginia.” Personally, I recommend brushing up on your Harry Potter Puppet Pals knowledge before coming for optimal enjoyment.
Voices of the Class, produced by the student-run organization Spectrum Theater, is playing in the Chemistry Auditorium Thursday, Friday and Saturday at 8 p.m., with an additional matinee Saturday at 3 p.m., which includes a talkback after the performance during which the actors and staff answer any questions concerning Voices, Spectrum Theater or the University in general. Tickets are $5.

In the world of primetime television, the old adage that “everything old is new again” has been taken to an extreme in recent years. With the steady decline in the number of scripted shows and the explosion of reality TV, we as viewers have been saturated with reality shows based on ridiculous premises, and this upcoming fall season will be no exception.
Arguably, the last truly successful sitcom debut was more than five years ago with CBS’s Two and a Half Men in 2003. Since then, more often than not scripted television fails to last much past the pilot season. As a result, networks shy away from funding the expensive productions of such shows. When I worked at a television production company this past summer, I got to see first-hand the exorbitant number of reality pitches versus the infrequent ideas for scripted shows, especially sitcoms, that get sent to networks — and the percentages were astounding.
Thanks to this trend, we as viewers get to enjoy the often absurd, rarely engaging reality shows that come and go at an increasingly rapid rate (who could forget winners like Fox’s Married by America or ABC’s Are You Hot? in 2003?). This season, networks will debut some similarly bizarre concepts that will most likely not last more than one season.
On MTV we will see Paris Hilton Needs a New BFF. Yes, somehow, uber-socialite Paris Hilton doesn’t have enough friends and needs her own reality show to find a new best buddy. VH1 will be debuting the almost eerily similar Bromance, starring none other than The Hills party boy Brody Jenner. Jenner has decided he needs a new bro to join him in his life of exclusive clubs, expensive vacations, beautiful women — all with no real job in sight. Men will compete in a series of tasks to gain the opportunity to win Brody over with the hopes of joining his entourage.
Even worse, networks cannot even seem to come up with original reality shows anymore. While at least ABC’s lineup displays a few unique new shows (America’s Toughest Jobs looks pretty promising), MTV and VH1 are both debuting shows that are simply reprises of their old hits, given some sort of plot twist and labeled a new show.
On VHI, former reality queen Sharon Osbourne will host Rock of Love Girls: Charm School, based on the idea that the hard partying girls of Rock of Love 1 and 2 are in major need of a manners lesson. Who better to tutor them in lady skills than metal mama Sharon Osbourne? In my mind, the last thing VHI needs is another cheesy reality show. Still, is it so much to ask that every show VH1 develops not be based off ones we’ve already seen?
Though not a reality show, perhaps no new show captures the lack of originality on television better than the CW’s recreation of Beverly Hills 90210. 90210 looks at some of the old Beverly Hills crowd (Jennie Garth and Shannon Doherty are the two returning cast members) in their grown-up lives.
While Beverly Hills 90210 was an iconic show in its day, the time has come for some original programming. Networks should have the creative capacity to develop shows that are not simply recycled versions of old hits. And furthermore, now that the writers’ strike of this past year has been fully resolved, more scripted shows should be making it on air instead of the reality overload we’ve been seeing for the past 10 years. But until this happens, well, I guess there’s always HBO.

Tim Be Told plays Gravity Lounge
Last year’s Battle of the Bands winner Tim Be Told has continued to dominate the local music scene, opening for OK Go at last semester’s Springfest and earning positive notices from local music sages (such as Brad Savage of 106.1 The Corner) as the next big band out of Charlottesville. Sunday night, they hit the stage at Gravity Lounge (one of the last intimate, local music venues) with Northern Ireland’s Oppenheimer. It’s indie-pop-electronica meets pop-soul-gospel! Show starts at 8 p.m., with an $8 cover charge.
—by stephanie garcia

Oasis singer assaulted at recent gig
Last Sunday, Oasis guitarist Noel Gallagher was bum-rushed at Toronto’s Virgin Festival. According to reports, 47-year-old Daniel Sullivan entered the stage from the rear entrance and ran up to shove Mr. Gallagher forward. Noel fell on his monitor speakers, bruising his ribs and hip in the process. Though the band managed to finish their set, they were forced to cancel their next gig while Noel’s injuries were diagnosed and treated. While Sullivan has been charged with assault by Toronto police, he has since been released and is due in court on Oct. 24.
  —by ethan hamlin

Indecision caps off Fridays After Five series
In the final performance in the Charlottesville Pavilion’s 2008 Fridays After Five concert series, local music legend Indecision takes the stage. A true Charlottesville band comprised of former Western Albemarle High School and Charlottesville High School students, Indecision has played several regional festivals and had an appearance at 2003’s Bonnaroo. Playing the likes of Phish, Spin Doctors and the Neville Brothers, Indecision has stayed true to the sound they created when they formed in 1984. They close up this year’s Fridays series, with the Mark Miller Band opening at 5:30 p.m.
—by stephanie garcia

The drama department is calling committers and non-committers alike to come see a show about cold feet and trying relationships. Neil LaBute’s Some Girl(s) — a play that grapples with commitment phobia — will head off the University drama department’s 2008-09 season.
The story chronicles the life of Guy, a successful writer about to marry his beautiful fiancée. Before he makes his vows, however, he decides to revisit his past.
“He goes back to all his ex-girlfriends who he thinks he has hurt the most … They are all very different and they have all been affected by him in different ways,” fourth-year publicity assistant Casey Paul said. “In a way, he’s trying to absolve himself.”
Director Melissa Crespo said anyone can relate to the play’s theme of love.
“[It’s about] trials and tribulations, more about trials,” she said. “It’s about really finding not just the heartache, but the humor.”
Crespo, a graduate of the class of 2005, was invited back to guest-direct this show.
“Directing found me when I was here — I was fortunate enough to direct all semesters [while at the University],” Crespo said. Since her graduation, she has been actively directing in Washington and New York through two directing fellowships at Arena Stage and Second Stage Theatre, respectively. She also has worked in Shepherdstown, W.Va. at the Contemporary American Theater Festival, in St. Thomas, where she directed “The Nutcracker,” and in New York City for a one-act.
Crespo was not involved in picking the play, but she seemed excited about the choice. She admitted that the decision might have been influenced by the fact that there are always more girls than boys trying out for shows — the show has four female roles and just one male part.
She also noted, however, that LaBute is one of the few playwrights who writes for young people. Not even 50, LaBute is an acclaimed author notorious for writing about controversial topics.
“He has a very twisted way of looking at reality,” second-year College student Danny Cackley said. “He doesn’t accept some of the things we take for granted.”
Unusually, the play consists entirely of drama majors, who will portray Guy and four of his heartbroken ex-girlfriends. Both Cackley and fourth-year Kathryn Connors, who will portray ex-girlfriend Sam, have acted in several other shows for the drama department, including Twelfth Night and The Voysey Inheritance, respectively. Second-year Jacquie Walters — who has acted in So Careless and Inside the Box — will portray ex-girlfriend Tyler. It is a theater debut for fourth-year students Danielle Chan (who will portray ex Lindsay) and Laura Muschelli (who will portray ex Bobbi).
Crespo is working to develop a realistic show for her audience and hopes it won’t be a one-sided story.
“My goal is that people can see both sides and that in matters of love it takes two,” she said.
Cackley mentioned similar goals and challenges he has had with his character.
“I want to make sure he isn’t vilified,” he said.” I don’t want to portray him as an evil guy; he just doesn’t know what he wants.”
Throughout the performance, audience members will delve into issues involving women, men, relationships and ethics.
“It’s a very intimate show, an edge-of-your-seat show with a lot of drama and comedy,” Cackley said.

During the morning of Wednesday, Aug. 27, Kevin “Skwerl” Cogill was arrested by the FBI for leaking nine tracks from the highly anticipated, long-awaited Guns N’ Roses’ album Chinese Democracy. Cogill, a 27-year-old music blogger at antiquiet.com, faces up to five years in jail and a maximum fine of $250,000. He has since set up a “defense fund” on his site to help him pay for his trial expenses and retain his freedom.
Cogill was officially charged with copyright infringement and arrested at gunpoint. Two hours later, The Associated Press and the Los Angeles Times were on the story. Cogill, music buff turned convict, is being made an example by the FBI for the disposal of his personal freedom and love for rock ‘n’ roll. Of the nine tracks leaked, only three had yet to be heard by the public. In fact, Cogill was the seventh party involved in the album’s 15-year anticipation to leak parts of the album. He was, however, the first to be arrested.
Prior to the production of Chinese Democracy, Guns N’ Roses released The Spaghetti Incident?, back in 1993. Since then, fans have witnessed the band break up, reconvene, perform a little and cancel a lot. When GNR started production of Chinese Democracy in 1994, Cogill was only just a teenager. That is when he and fellow GNR admirers would embark on a dormant journey of delay, one that would lead to the disillusionment and frustration of thousands of fans.
Unfortunately, the band did not dedicate the 18 years toward creating the new album. In fact, they did quite the opposite. In 1996, Slash quit the band, calling front-man Rose a dictator. Nine Inch Nails’s Robin Finck and Josh Freese joined the crew, in addition to Tommy Stinson of The Replacements.
With a $1 million persuasion from Geffen Records, Rose rejoined and Fink returned to Nine Inch Nails. At that point, Geffen offered Rose another $1 million in return for a completed album by March 1, 1999, but Rose failed to follow through. (Recently, owners of Dr. Pepper made their own offer, vouching to give a free can of its soda to everyone in America in exchange for a 2008 release date.)
Unable to complete their album, Guns N’ Roses began four national and international tours between 1999 and 2007. Both ended in ludicrous cancellations, disappointed fans and even some destructive riots. In 2002, MTV and national viewers were granted a rare three-song performance at the 2002 Video Music Awards.
But six years later, after most of us gave up on one of classic rock’s defining bands, Cogill gave us hope in releasing nine nearly-finished tracks. His “copyright infringement,” in my opinion, was a service to the fans and band combined. While he faces potential charges and time, Guns N’ Roses must now appease the added pressure of releasing their album.
With the media coverage and hype created by the leaking of the tracks, fans have regained interest in the stagnant band. When Guns N’ Roses management made the phone call to Cogill asking him to remove the tracks from antiquiet.com, they probably should have thrown in a thank you while they were at it.
Instead, Cogill was arrested. Not by local or state police, but by the Federal Bureau of Investigation. He has been embarrassed and now disenfranchised for loving music and allowing others to do the same. This appears to be another instance of music labels becoming further disconnected with their fans.
Editor’s note: The opinions expressed in this article are solely the views of the author, not the official position taken by The Cavalier Daily on the issue of copyright infringement.

Lately there has been an attention-grabbing commotion coming from the Amphitheater. Students should be respectful to others and ignore the proselytizing man who has descended on Grounds.
As scholars, we in the University community easily see the errors in the way this man presents his views — methods that are both rude and offensive. Rather than having useful intellectual debate, he prefers shouting insults at a crowd. Any attempt to engage him in debate has little chance of changing his mind. In other words, yelling back will do no good.
Large crowds gathering around this man just make the minor annoyance he causes worse. Crowds yelling back and forth with him reflect poorly on what should be a University environment characterized by reasoned debate.
What’s worse, the noise generated by a larger crowd is distracting to students in classrooms near the Amphitheater. Maury Hall, Minor Hall, Bryan Hall and Cocke Hall — whose library faces the Amphitheater — are all places where serious scholarly work is being done, and it is a shame for it to be disrupted by ignorance and shouting.
Large crowds encourage people like him to stay on Grounds. For them, being yelled at by college students is a sign they must be doing something right. As long as they have an audience, no matter whether that audience is considering their ideas or ridiculing them, they usually will not leave.
The best thing for everyone would be for students to simply go about their business as if there were no one yelling at them in the Amphitheater. Of course everyone has a right to exercise freedom of speech, but that right is wasted on superficial arguing. If meaningless shouting is ignored, reasoned debate can triumph — and at this University, that should be the goal.

In May 2008, China’s Sichuan province experienced a catastrophic earthquake that killed almost 70,000 people. Another 375,000 were seriously injured, and 4.8 million more lost their homes. Despite the immense distance between China and the University, many of the students and faculty here felt the impact of this tragedy.
Graduate Education student Jie Chao, a member of the Chinese Student & Scholars Society, was particularly affected. She and other members of CSSS set up donation boxes in the chemistry building and sent e-mails to friends asking for donations. Tom Rose received one of these e-mails, and thus a partnership was born.
Rose and Chao had something in common — neither one wanted to feel helpless anymore. Instead, they wanted to take meaningful action. When Rose received the e-mail, he recognized a group that could put his idea for a fundraising concert series into action.
“This is the only thing I know how to do,” Rose said in reference to the concert series. Rose works at the University for the Education School’s technology support staff but defines himself as a graphic designer and musician. With Rose’s musical contacts and prowess, and Chao’s and the CSSS’s finances, they were able to put the concert series into action.
The concert series began Aug. 1 this year. Since then, 16 concerts with musical styles ranging from classical to jazz to bluegrass, along with a large variety of rock bands, have been held. Artists have included amateurs and professionals alike.
Rose, who has been in charge of booking all the artists and venues, developed the idea as a result of his belief in the power of music.
“Music has pretty much been the food of life as long as I can remember,” he said. “The philosophy is a diversity of people coming together. We want to have a good time because we’re lucky enough to celebrate.”
Chao has been touched by the reaction to the project.
“It feels like home,” she said, adding that though many international students feel isolated from the Charlottesville community, “this particular project brings people together.”
The concerts span a variety of venues in Charlottesville including Rapture, The Outback Lodge and First Baptist Church. Support for the relief effort has come from a variety of sources, mostly notably the Education School, the International Studies Office and the University Alumni Association.
Both Rose and Chao emphasized the importance of the contributing musicians and the volunteers. With a core group of six and more 40 other volunteers, this project is still a massive effort that can always use more support.
“It’s been truly amazing,” Rose said. “But there are never enough donations.”
The Alligator Concert, the next installment of the series, is scheduled for Sept. 12 at Uncle Charlie’s Smokehouse. It is an excellent opportunity to hear some good music and donate to a worthy cause.
“We’re all neighbors, part of the same community,” Rose said. “It is this sentiment that brings out the best of our society. We’re all members of the same global community, and we’re all in a place to help other humans in need.”

One year after singlehandedly driving MTV’s Video Music Awards into the ground with a disastrous and dazed performance, Britney Spears returned to the VMA stage last Sunday to inject the flagging awards show with something she almost completely stripped from it — relevance. Appearing at the top of the show in a comedic skit with Superbad actor Jonah Hill, Spears appeared happy, healthy and (perhaps most relieving of all, after last year) sober.
This year marked the 25th anniversary of the VMAs, although besides a quick mention by Spears, there was little made of what should have been a monumental event that has hosted several marquee performances from the likes of Madonna, Prince and Spears herself. Rather than have the originals perform, MTV was content to allow Katy Perry of “I Kissed A Girl” fame to wrestle “Like a Virgin” and have Miley Cyrus perform “Livin’ on a Prayer” (yes, really) in an unfunny skit designed to promote the “Rock Band” game.
Host Russell Brand has quickly become the focal point of all talk about this year’s show. After a series of hilarious promotional spots with Spears and LL Cool J, anticipation was high that he would deliver. He did deliver — however, not exactly in the way planned. Oozing a sort of wackiness that MTV used to breathe, Brand attacked President Bush, plugged Sen. Barack Obama and made mincemeat out of teen sensations the Jonas Brothers. It was Brand’s running joke about the Brothers’ virginity — which they have used to market themselves, not totally unlike Spears circa 2000 — that has become the VMA must-see moment of 2008.
Brand’s special kind of wackiness steered the show, which veered from mediocrity to brilliance in the course of two hours. Several acts such as Perry, Lupe Fiasco, The Ting Tings and LL had their performances cut out by commercials, so when the show returned, they were nearly finished. With the show in Los Angeles, for the first time in 10 years, MTV attempted to use the studio lots of television and movie productions as the stages of several performances. Only P!nk, singing her brand new glam-rock single “So What,” was able to take full advantage of the format. Staging explosions left and right, she roused the crowd with a shot of adrenaline that unfortunately was missing for much of the show.
The main stage was filled throughout the night with performances from Lil Wayne (who also performed awkwardly with Kid Rock later), Paramore (who rocked through “Misery Business” in their best early No Doubt impression) and a goth-esque Christina Aguilera, who slinked her way through an electro-remix of “Genie in a Bottle” before launching into her new single, “Keeps Getting Better.”
By the time the Video of the Year award rolled around, Britney had already picked up two earlier awards for her “Piece of Me” video, Tokio Hotel had won Best New Artist, Chris Brown had collected the Best Male Video for “With You” and Linkin Park had earned a sneer from former Guns N’ Roses guitarist Slash when they won Best Rock Video. The award went to Miss Spears again, and she was sure to thank her fans yet again for their continued support.
Kanye West was called in to close the show, and he did not disappoint. Dressed in a simple suit, Kanye stood almost still while he ripped his newest song, “Love Lockdown” (think a rave-inspired “Lollipop”). Cementing his one-in-a-million status, West wowed the crowd with his dramatic backdrop of space-inspired effects and pure showmanship. It marked an exhilarating end to a show that often lacked direction and perhaps relied too heavily on the resurrection of Spears.

The most convenient way for students to get an unofficial transcript from the University — a document many employers, schools and internships require — is through the registrar’s Integrated Student Information System.
Unfortunately, the transcript provided though ISIS cannot easily be converted into a form presentable to employers. Though the Web page on which it appears can be printed or converted into a PDF, either option includes a logout button and a URL at the top of the page. The text is also small and in a difficult-to-read font.
All in all, the document appears neither official nor professional. Placing the text in a Word document or Photoshop, however, might make employers suspicious that the transcript has been tampered with.
When it updates ISIS, the registrar’s office should make sure the system provides a way to create attractive, official-looking documents. It may be difficult with the current system, but since ISIS is being re-worked anyway, this should be a part of the update.

When Brian Wilson’s new release came out last week, in all honesty — and may the gods of Rock ‘n’ Roll smite me for saying this — I wasn’t expecting much when I sat down to listen to the 66-year-old former Beach Boy’s latest work.
Though generally well-received by critics (including this one), That Lucky Old Sun has its flaws. It’s good, but it’s not Wilson’s best. The scattered success of the album is not unique to Wilson — his contemporaries, big names of the 1960s who have forged new albums in the years since, have received similar reviews. Wilson’s musical creativity, like that of his brilliant contemporary Paul McCartney, has faded but still shows flashes of genius. McCartney’s last album (Memory Almost Full) simply wasn’t memorable, save a few excellent songs (please, rock gods, have mercy). Of course, when you have a reputation like Wilson or McCartney, your past work makes for some pretty tough competition.
In the same way that Memory still has its gems, That Lucky Old Sun is, overall, a pleasant surprise. Despite Wilson’s long-running history of mental illness and depression (including more than three years during which he confined himself to his bed and overate), the album is chock full of bouncy and blissful tunes that remain strongly reminiscent of his Beach Boy days.
In fact, the consistently bright mood of the album — which at times seems to tease the boundaries between cheerful and sickening — is among the album’s few flaws. Only “Midnight’s Another Day” gives any hint of the struggles that defined Wilson’s life for decades. Still, the song’s lyrics and dramatic piano part are truly affecting, providing more of a window into Wilson’s mind than any other song on the album. One particularly personal line reads, “All these memories / made me feel like stone. / All these people / made me feel so alone.”
At the other end of the mood spectrum from “Midnight’s Another Day” are the four awkwardly gleeful “Narratives” ­— my main issue with the album as a whole — that surface occasionally between songs on the album. The narratives, which feature Wilson’s voice performing something like a poetry reading, successfully cross the line from sweet to sickening. The verses are odd and disjointed, as though words were chosen at random with no connection other than a rhyme scheme.
Although the narratives’ lyrics may at times flirt with poetry, it’s hard to believe Wilson put too much thought into them. A line appears in “Narrative: Between Pictures,” for example, claiming that “‘To be or not to be’ / now is part of the heartbeat in L.A.,” inadvertently making the suggestion through literary reference that the entire city is suicidal.
While Wilson’s evident enthusiasm here is admirable (aren’t we all glad to see him back on his feet, both literally and figuratively?), the way he delivers his pseudo-poetry is admittedly a bit over the top. His voice randomly fluctuates, adding emphasis to rhymes and attempted puns, making the tracks sound like a preparation for storytime with Mister Rogers.
As for Wilson’s voice during the actual music, listener appreciation is dependent entirely on expectations. Those avid Beach Boy fans who hoped the new album would be a showcase for Wilson’s voice (despite the fact that four decades have passed since his days with the Beach Boys) will be mildly disappointed.
Wilson’s pipes, like McCartney’s and those of every other 60-something-year-old musician (with the exception of James Taylor), occasionally show their age. In songs like “Forever She’ll Be My Surfer Girl” (which thankfully, given the singer’s age, turned out to be a nostalgic ode rather than a song about actually surfing), Wilson once again pulls out his 1960’s-esque falsetto. While the song is altogether successful, the high notes are quavering and a bit frightening.
For someone his age and with his rocky psychological history, Wilson’s new album That Lucky Old Sun is a bundle of joy, despite the occasional vocal and lyrical faux pas. Given my preliminary expectations, the album is worth every second — excepting the horrendous narratives — it takes to listen to it.