Ask Edgar: Famed poet solves career-quest dilemmas, describes "real" Harlem Shake, weather-appropriate attire

Yo Ed,
The weather is so unpredictable lately that I can’t even get dressed in the morning. Some days I have my bean boots on and it don’t even rain, then when I take out my super fresh Keg Kill tank, it decides to snow that day, and the worst is when I have to wear my Wallabee’s with lax shorts. What do I do?
—Under the Weather

Dear Under the Weather,
Edgar says: layers on layers on layers. Just wear everything you own simultaneously so that you’re never caught off guard. Ha, take that! Or, you know, you could just check the weather each morning. There’s an app for that.

Dearest Edgar,
I cannot figure out what a Harlem Shake is. I don’t have Facebook because it interferes with my studies, but on the Channel 29 news this weekend they showed hundreds of U.Va. students gathered at the Rotunda dancing like fools. Where did this strange behavior come from?
Hopeless Hoo

Dear Hopeless Hoo,
I don’t think anyone really understands what exactly the Harlem Shake is. Watching the Harlem Shake is kind of like trying to navigate through Thornton Hall — you see a lot of crazy people and just end up confused. Although watching Dean Groves break it down was certainly a highlight of the U.Va. Harlem Shake, the rest of the video seemed like a Halloween party gone very wrong. Dancing like that should be reserved for the dark basements of frat houses where both absurd costumes and outrageous dancing are socially acceptable. The Harlem Shake is just another fad that will hopefully fade into oblivion as quickly as it started. Dancing like that should never see the light of day.
Stay classy,

Hey Ed,
Okay, so there are, like, a lot of career fairs going on. Everybody in my dorm comes back with all these pamphlets, copies of their resumes and free stickers and stuff. I don’t even know what I want to major in! I can’t help but feel behind the game.
Nonchalant Novice

Dear Novice,
Considering you haven’t had to declare a major yet, Edgar can only assume you’re a youngin’ who doesn’t need to be panicking about these things yet. Free stickers would definitely help cheer me up in this situation, but for a little more tangible guidance I suggest making a stop by University Career Services to get a kick-start. Drop in at Bryant Hall Monday through Friday 1-3 p.m. for 15 minutes to get your resume critiqued by a professional, or make an appointment for a 45-minute session for more in-depth advising. That should help lessen the freak-out a bit.

related stories