There is a certain mystery to an unfamiliar package. Yesterday, a purchase I made three years ago on Kickstarter arrived on my doorstep. Apparently, I thought I needed a “Phorce” messenger bag that can charge my iPhone or laptop for up to seven hours. I regret this purchase somewhat, as Apple has since made rather dramatic improvements in battery life since 2011.
The joy of Kickstarter, however, is not the projects themselves. It comes from an appreciation for the unbridled enthusiasm of American ingenuity. Inventors must feel an intense sense of validity when they can convince people to pay $93 for a pirate pancake griddle.
The freedom of the individual to invent is distinctly patriotic. Since the first Patent Act in 1790, if you want to invent a shoe with a built in air conditioner, it is your right. Even Mr. Jefferson quipped that the act had “given a spring to invention beyond his conception.” Kickstarter brings these inventions to the masses. It is a great privilege to live in a nation where inventors can freely muse and amuse.
Each day I check my inbox with glee to see what new treasures shall soon clutter my home. It’s a wonder that I once lived without “Spread THAT,” a butter knife that heats itself, or “The Golden Goose,” an ingenious device that allows me to scramble eggs while they are still in the shell. One might think, “Does Abraham have any impulse control when it comes to kitchen appliances?”
The answer is no. I may have had the only dorm room with a proper apparatus to shuck oysters, but since then, I have resisted many compelling kitchen objects. These include, but are not limited to, an electric kettle I could control from my iPhone and “Bruvelo,” a coffee maker so precise you can calibrate the water temperature based on the origin of the beans.
There is no greater satisfaction than finding a shortcut or, to use the somewhat absurd neologism, “a lifehack.” Conversely, nothing puts us quite in the doldrums as much as having a shortcut taken away from us, i.e. “The Fence.” I have this fantasy I will eventually find the shortcut that keeps me from being five minutes late, and most Kickstarter projects I fund constitute some vain effort to close this gap. These include the Dash Wallet, which makes my most frequently used card easier to access, and SALT, which circumvents my iPhone’s screen lock. There are so many profoundly frustrating problems in our world that I can find a little satisfaction in helping to solve the minutiae.
But just as many of my Kickstarter purchases are to simply encourage this splendid ideal of creative invention. How else could I justify the “Ostrich Pillow,” an encapsulating napping pillow that makes me look like an elephant-skinned provolone, or Kerfluffles artisan marshmallows, or Kolibree, a toothbrush that sends sends me a dental report and offers relief from my somewhat neurotic dentist?
Early adoption is not without its downfalls, however. In fact, being a Kickstarter is something even more audacious than just being an early adopter. At best, it’s a leap of faith in someone so passionate about kevlar socks that they not only made a movie that appears to have been art directed by Ansel Adams, but they’re also asking for $10,000. Perhaps even more exciting is that this sock fanatic would go on to raise nearly $100,000. At worst, you’re faced with the emotional turmoil of inventor vicissitudes. Whether it be their 47 manufacturing delays or an inability to source waterproof zippers — the topic of an email I actually received — you feel it too.
For all of Kickstarter’s drawbacks, however, we should still appreciate the inventors who are trying to make life a little easier. Lionizing people working to solve the world’s tragedies is certainly appropriate, but this doesn’t mean we can’t also show a little love for the guy who is just trying to help us tie our shoes.
Abraham’s column runs biweekly Fridays. He can be reached at a.axler@cavalierdaily.com.
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