1. The sink trick
You know, the one where you tape down the button of the spray hose so it soaks your victim when he or she turns on the sink. Always a classic, this prank was probably thought up by an eight-year-old way too smart for his own good. Bless his soul, though, because you’re about to super-soak your unsuspecting roommate. Time this right, and you could probably even make it onto the Campus Story too! Your roommates will probably thank you, as they could’ve used a shower anyway.
2. Saran wrap the toilet seat
Another classic, this is definitely the dad joke of all pranks. You know, the one that seems funny in your head so you say it out loud, only to realize that it’s vaguely offensive, questionably appropriate and definitely doesn’t make sense. I’d suggest pulling this prank before your roommate gets sprayed by the sink, as after this they will certainly require a shower. Make sure you pull this prank on someone lighthearted, though, because with someone touchy... stuff might hit the fan.
3. Put confetti in your friend’s backpack
Now every class will be a party! I’m hard-pressed to find anything as festively annoying as confetti, so, naturally, filling a friend’s bag with it is a great idea. Not only will she have sparkly things all over her notebooks, the entirety of any area she opens her backpack in will be instantly party-itized. Think of it as the new and improved “find your friends” app. It’s like she’s leaving a trail of breadcrumbs, only more glittery. She’ll never be able to lie about her whereabouts again.
4. Streak South Lawn
I firmly believe that South Lawn is underappreciated. South Lawn is just as cute as the real Lawn, right? South Lawn is just as smart as the real Lawn. People totally like South Lawn just as much as they like the real Lawn. We should totally just streak South Lawn! But, kidding aside, I don’t think South Lawn gets enough love. Streak from that new café in New Cabell to the Starbucks in Nau. Whisper “Happy April Fools’” to the inevitably huge line at Starbucks.
5. Don’t show up to class
President Sullivan totally should’ve called a snow day that one time a few weeks before Spring Break, so take this absolutely legitimate opportunity to make up for her fault. If your professor marks it as an unexcused absence, just send him or her a pointed email with the subject line “April Fools.” Obviously, her marking you absent was a fun way of playing her own April Fools joke on you. Who says professors can’t be fun?
6. Show up to class
The antithesis of my prior suggestion, this prank is for those who have perfected the art of the personal day. Show up to that 15-person seminar you’ve been skipping because your professor posts the slides online. She’ll wonder who the random student who decided to drop in with a month left in the semester is. Don’t worry, your classmates will thank you, as you will most definitely take up at least ten minutes of class time convincing your professor that you are, in fact, enrolled in the class. For an extra good time, turn in some homework too.
7. Tell your mom you studied for your test
For the record, my mom is still convinced that I haven’t received my grades from second semester of first year yet. In her mind, my GPA is a 4.0 and the only Trinity I know is the one in Holy form hanging in Florence, Italy. Though this may be a little cruel, imagine how proud your mother would be if you a) called her without being prompted and b) told her how much hard work you’ve been doing. You may want to leave out the April Fools part for a few months, and let her ride out this joke for about two months or forever. I may or may not do this on days that aren’t April Fools. Sorry mom, I love you. Seriously. Not April Fools.
8. Only watch one episode of “Friends”
I swear, the last words out of my mouth one day will be, “I’m just going to watch one episode. It’s only 22 minutes long!” Four hours later, I’m in a shame spiral heading quickly downwards away from all the homework I should be doing. Shock everyone and really just watch one episode. Look at all the free time you have now! Go outside and get some fresh air, or something. It’s April now, so it technically should be warm out. Not like the weather cares, but at least you’ll have viable grounds to complain about it now that you’ve stepped foot outside.
9. Go to the gym
I know it, you know it, all of social media knows it if you’re one of those people: your New Years resolution was to get yourself to the gym more. One step into the AFC come the beginning of the spring semester and that resolution was quickly shattered, as the AFC tends to be a fun intersection of competitive elliptical-ing and looking at yourself in the mirror while lifting three pound weights. A sad, confusing and weird smelling place. Forget all that, and get yourself there! Happy April Fools to all the AFC regulars who are now pissed that you took their favorite treadmill.
10. Go into the Rotunda
My personal favorite. Forget the construction, the big black fence thing and the illegality of the situation. Revel in your youthful ability to climb, and scale the wall to enter the biggest landmark of our great University. Or, better yet, do the entire University a solid and channel the piece of the Berlin Wall that is inexplicably outside Alderman. That wall came down, and so can this one. And, if you really want the whole University to love you, knock down the fence by the tracks while you’re at it. Thomas Jefferson would have admired your gall and dedication to the betterment of the students of this great school.
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