“Hurry up — it’s seven o’clock!” I told my mom and brother, rushing to join the crowd of people surrounding the stage. We were at Kings Dominion’s Halloween Haunt, and the Overlord’s Resurrection was about to start. Creepy music soon blasted through the speakers, and the Overlord, followed by a parade of monsters, marched on stage. He gave a short speech as the monsters watched him with reverence, ultimately giving his monsters permission to terrify all of the amusement park’s guests.
Suddenly, all of the monsters turned around and grinned sinisterly at the crowd. Though I nervously took a few steps away so I would not be an easy target, I reminded myself I wanted to be scared. Trying to hide and avoid the monsters would only make the night less fun. From then on, I walked through the scare zones and haunted houses without hesitation. From clowns to dolls to zombies, any monster had easy access to scare me.
Although I experienced a few jump scares, at the end of the night I realized I truly was not afraid during the Haunt. In fact, I was smiling and laughing the majority of the time I was there, mostly at how scared the other guests were and how dramatically the monsters acted. What had once terrified me in middle and high school was now a source of entertainment.
As I reflect on this fun night with my family, I can now see how I have learned to face my fears in other areas of my life as well, especially the ones I have in college. Coming from a small private high school, I was used to being around the same students and teachers each year. However, coming into U.Va., I knew no one. Although meeting new people was nerve-wracking, I had to do it in order to make friends and thrive socially. Even more intimidating to me as a first year was going to office hours. I knew talking to my professors was supposed to help me to improve my grades and build connections, but I was too nervous to talk to them by myself.
Despite these social challenges, probably the greatest fear I had coming into college was receiving low grades. Though I did not have perfect grades in high school, I was used to getting As and Bs on my assignments. I knew college would have a much more challenging workload, but I feared that I could not be successful if I did not receive As.
As I begin my second year, these fears no longer scare me. I have learned many students here are friendly and easy to talk to, helping me make several amazing friends. Also, office hours are not as daunting as they seem. When I finally worked up the courage last year, my professors were welcoming and genuinely wanted to help me.
Finally, I now know not getting an A is not the end of the world. Though getting grades lower than I expected in certain classes last year greatly upset me, it helped me to see in what areas I needed to improve and ultimately gave me a reality check. At an academically rigorous university like U.Va., working hard does not always equal receiving A’s. All that matters is that I put forth the best work I am capable of.
However, there are still a few fears I have left to conquer, mainly knowing what I am going to do with my life. While I’ve settled on my majors and enjoy the coursework so far, I do not have a specific career in mind yet. Nevertheless, by listening to my professors and other professionals talk about how they ended up where they are today, I have learned it is totally okay to have these uncertainties. While some people know as students what career they want to pursue, others do not know until several years after graduation.
Even though the dark of the future is daunting, I cannot let it scare me. Instead, I must move forward without hesitation, wielding the light of confidence and optimism.
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