I never knew exactly what Boxing Day was until my Canadian cousin explained it to me during Winter Break.
Boxing Day is a holiday of mostly historical value, observed in celebrating countries by closing nearly all businesses and banks. In the States, however, many typically do just the opposite this time of year — come Dec. 26, malls become just about as crowded as they were barely a month before on the infamous Black Friday.
The morning after Christmas, Americans tend to head back to the mall to exchange the gifts they received for what they really wanted. In other words, we — wait for it — box up our original gifts, and return them for something new. And thus exists our own, albeit warped, version of Boxing Day.
In fact, it was while I was partaking in this practice at my local suburban mall that I began to recognize a phenomenon even more unsettling than the consumerist framework in which we enjoy the holidays: signs. Invisible, yet painfully blatant signs were worn around the necks of almost all shoppers I encountered.
Nearly everyone in the line at each store I entered — save some random, often elderly few — was on his or her phone. Lines were long, yes, and I am characteristically impatient. But the lines could have been tolerable had they not been made up of silent, uninterested people. Thus, what really irked me was this: when we’re all walking around with our eyes on our phone and our nose to the ground, it is like we are wearing a sign that says, “Sorry. I’m busy. Don’t talk to me.”
I’m not about to get up on my proverbial soapbox and start preaching about the ills of technology. Digital connectivity, for all intents and purposes, is great. But when you turn from your phone and take note of everyone around you, it’s shocking to realize that you’re the only one in the room that’s looking up.
My mall experience this Dec. 26, then, was highly unsuccessful — I couldn’t stand to wait in line at a single store. I’m a people person, so put me in a room with strangers and I’ll find good conversation. Thus, the idea of waiting in a seemingly endless line wasn’t as terrifying as the idea of waiting among people with demeanors akin to signs suggesting they would not be open to conversing.
This “sign” phenomenon is something which can be observed while walking around Grounds. I am always overwhelmingly excited to see familiar faces on passerbyes. However, there are always a few who escape me and my crazy-cheery glare — those with phones in hand, and headphones in both ears.
My experience on the American version of Boxing Day, then, helped me realize why exactly this trend unsettles me. What really discomforted me was the sight of people being totally incognizant of anyone beside them, wearing signs that read, “I don’t care about you.”
It’s not an intentional sign. No one — or, at the very least, I would hope no one — goes on his or her phone while waiting in line with the intention of displaying inconsideration and unfriendliness. But that doesn’t stop the message from being sent, or the sign from being worn.
You’ve heard it before, but I’ll say it again: in a world so chock-full of constant communication, when did we all stop talking to each other face to face?
My winter break’s redeeming quality, though, was a 900-mile trip across the desert of western Texas which proved to me the sign phenomenon does not pervade the nation completely. In response to an ice storm outside El Paso, my dad and I headed south and swung by Del Rio, Texas, all the while stopping in several roadside towns full of friendly, eager conversationalists. It was in driving that seemingly endless stretch of highway that I saw and was incredibly gladdened by the fact that, in some places, people still talk to each other.
I was able to sustain meaningful conversation with many individuals I encountered on my trip — individuals who were uninhibited by “signs” that would have steered me away. Thus, perhaps not all is lost with regards to face-to-face communication. Still, while on shopping endeavors like my day after Christmas experience and similar (not so) social situations, I worry about the technological walls we’ve constructed around us.
Mary’s column runs biweekly Thursdays. She can be reached at m.long@cavalierdaily.com.
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