Sorry to keep you waiting, faithful readers. My article on feminine game-playing is in the works and will run in my next column.
I don't need to remind you of the pervasive gloom of midterms. They are here. It seems like they will not end. There is no escape from them, save the academic coward's way out (i.e. not studying and hoping for the best). For those of us who brave the solitary stacks of Alderman, the congestion of Clark Hall and the disconcerting silence of Clemons' first floor, we often forget that, in between cramming sessions and maintaining a healthy social life, our bodies demand adequate sleep. Remember sleep? I know your eyes are searing red from all the Greenberry's pick-me-ups and Red Bull that have kept you hard at work for two days straight now, but can't you think back and recall those warm August days when you could snuggle into bed covered by nothing more than a thin sheet and doze off for a full 11 hours? Oh the splendor of summer repose.
Now some of you might be thinking, "Summer repose? What am I, Sleeping Beauty? I've got things to do. I'll sleep when I'm dead. I don't have the time to just lie around for hours, not accomplishing anything. Sleep is wasteful. Sleep is for the weak." I used to feel that way too. Writing this article convinced me otherwise, and I hope reading it will do the same for you.
As part of his freshman orientation at Cornell University, my friend Steve attended a lecture by a professor who specialized in the science of sleep. Steve told me that the researcher's main points were that insufficient sleep lowers one's ability to perform in a wide array of waking categories and that college students are some of the most common victims of poor sleep habits. In one example he gave, the lecturer cited a study in which equivalent exams were administered to people who had benefited from eight hours of sleep the previous night and those who had gotten only five hours of shut-eye. The test results marked a difference of night and day. In Steve's words, those who had slept only five hours were "struggling balls." He tried to convince me then to prioritize proper sleeping habits.
Unconvinced by Steve's hearsay, I decided to look online to see if modern science agreed with the lecturer Steve heard. I found research compiled by the Franklin Institute on its Web site. Here's what recent scientific evidence has to say: According to a University of Chicago study, "chronic sleep loss may not only hasten the onset but could also increase the severity of age-related ailments such as diabetes, hypertension, obesity, and memory loss." A study by the University of Minnesota Medical School found that, "one complete night of sleep deprivation is as impairing in simulated driving tests as a legally intoxicating blood-alcohol level." That one really surprised me.
As for the benefits of sufficient sleep, I deferred again to scientific evidence from the Franklin Institute's Web site. Dr. Michael Stryker of the University of California-San Francisco drew a conclusion that turned my ideas about cramming upside down. He studied how sleep affects learning and memory retention and suggested that before an exam "if you reviewed your notes thoroughly until you were tired and then slept, you'd achieve as much plasticity, or 'learning,' in the brain as if you'd pulled an all-nighter repeating your review of the material." A study at the same university found "direct evidence that sleep modifies the effect of environmental stimuli on the development of new brain connections." In other words, experiences you have during waking hours are cemented in memory while you sleep at night. A study by Harvard Medical School reiterated this finding and concluded that decision-making, memory retention and learning-complicated skills all require adequate sleep. I was starting to come around.
Then I wondered how much sleep is considered enough. I found an answer through the Kirsch Foundation Web site. Cornell professor James Maas, who turns out to be the anonymous lecturer my friend Steve heard, believes that the widely circulated eight hours notion is inaccurate, concluding that "One-third of all Americans get six hours of sleep a night or less when they should be getting nine or ten." Referring to the natural dream cycle, he states that "If you're a six-hour sleeper, you're missing that last, important opportunity to repair and prepare for the coming day."
Whether or not I've convinced you to dedicate more time to sleep as part of a healthy lifestyle, I hope I've at least gotten you to consider those hours you spend motionless at night as something more than a waste of time. As far as science can tell, they are in fact critical to any activities you might engage in during the daytime. I hate to be cliché, but I really ought to go to bed now. It's near two in the morning, and I've got class in a few hours. I'm sure you've got studying to get to anyway. My article on the feminine side of game-playing is in the works and will appear in the next edition of Zumbody's Business. Until then, faithful readers.
Thomas Zumberge is a Health & Sexuality columnist. He can be reached at zumberge@cavalierdaily.com
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