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Humor

Hallmark’s new Valentine’s Day collection hits the shelves

By Kate McCarthy | February 14, 2023

What is Valentine’s Day without last-minute Hallmark cards from CVS? This year, Hallmark has outdone themselves with their Valentine’s Day collection.

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Humor

Misheard

By Kate McCarthy | February 12, 2023

After the second, third, or twentieth time asking someone to repeat what they said, the conversation comes to an awkward halt. To avoid this issue, assumptions must be made about what people say. If your brain is anything like mine, these assumptions are often entirely incorrect.

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Humor

U.Va. posts Alderman library on Instagram hyping up another empty promise

By Isabella Li | January 31, 2023

To people who are also very worried whether the renovations will ever be completed, here is some advice

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Humor

A beginning-of-semester update regarding facility issues on-grounds

By Camila Cohen Suárez | January 29, 2023

U.Va. Housing & Residence Life has heard the dormitory living concerns from on-Grounds residents loudly and clearly over the past several months, and we are writing to provide you with an end-of-semester update on the steps we have taken to respond to these reports.

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Humor

The Time Before the Time Before the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

By Alexander Kurtz | December 3, 2022

Yes, it’s that most wonderful time when all can gather round to collectively watch people forget Thanksgiving exists, and move straight on to anticipating a holiday more than a month away. But what causes this strange phenomenon, and how can you, confused University student, protect yourself from it?

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Humor

Dear first years — an open letter

By Maggie McHaty | November 10, 2022

Your first semester of college is almost over and you’re either thinking that this is the most fun you’ve ever had or you’re questioning if you peaked in high school. Regardless, I am here with some Third Year wisdom.

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Humor

Your plushies want to steal your identity

By Camila Cohen Suárez | November 4, 2022

Do you like conspiracy theories? Well, friends, I am about to blow your tiny, school-induced burnout minds.

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Humor

Tips To Avoid The Ghost of Thomas Jefferson

By Wardah Kamran | November 2, 2022

The idea of Jefferson’s ghost roaming around might be scary and you might even be considering canceling your Halloween night plans, but don’t you worry because I’ve got you covered. 

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Humor

Your Personal NPC

By Kiera Chambers | October 29, 2022

If you have one character you see pretty often, you have a personal NPC. It’s like they’re meant to be where you are. Maybe they’re the background character in your life, and maybe they think of you as the background character in theirs.

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Humor

Costume Help for the Indecisive and Procrastinatory

By Selia Markley | October 27, 2022

If you’re reading this, I assume that means you and I are alike. Come Halloween, we share a common turmoil, if you will, over the desire to have a perfect costume but take no actionable steps to make that into a reality.

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Humor

10 More Things To Look Forward To as a Fourth-Year

By Ellie Wilkie | October 16, 2022

For the love of God, conduct your final streak before graduation itself. 

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Humor

Things that high school teachers told you would be important for college but aren’t

By Isabella Li | October 14, 2022

Many teachers give the “you will thank me later in college” rules and act like if you don’t use their rules, you will fail college. The fact is that most of your high school teachers have no clue about how the college education system works today.

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Humor

Five Ways to Not Look Like a Noob in Minecraft

By Wardah Kamran | September 28, 2022

If you have heard of the game Minecraft, you, probably like me, initially thought it was called “Mindcraft.” However, the game is apparently less about using your mind and more about mining.

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Humor

What Your Bodos Order Says About You

By Maggie McHaty | September 19, 2022

I go to Bodos so often the workers know me by name, and I know the employee shift schedule by heart. That being said, while I’ve learned a lot about bagels, I’ve learned even more about the people who eat them.