MY SUMMER was full of guilty pleasures. Sleeping till noon. Watching cartoons. Napping all day. Eating that extra scoop of ice cream. Not running that extra mile. But most importantly, watching every episode of "Survivor."
Yes, I was one of "those people" who watched every episode. Yes, I enjoyed the show. Yes, I had a crush on Colleen and hated Richard with a passion. But I learned priceless lessons about life and what it takes to be a true survivor in a world where rats are never on the menu, and a guy named Biff isn't filming you 24-seven.
In any situation, start out strong and enthusiastic. It's easy to get lost in the crowd and be forgotten. Perform your tasks and then do some more. Attempt to connect with the people around you, and then make sure you do. You're much more likely to be noticed and accepted if you work your hardest and prove to be a courteous and caring person. Sonja and Stacey stayed to themselves and only did what they had to do to get by, and they were some of the first to go.
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Don't be stupid. Sure, we all slip up sometimes, or forget vital information, and the world is forgiving. But not for the utter lack of common sense that caused B.B. to do his laundry in the group's drinking water and led to his being the second cast member to be cast off of Pulau Tiga.
Be aware of your potential narrow mindedness. Watch what you say and whom you say it to. Be respectful of others -- especially when in their company -- and try your best to understand where they're coming from. Joel was a macho chauvinistic pretty boy who freely expressed his opinions on women. Incidentally, his fellow island-mates of the female gender gave him the boot. Sure, Rudy had many interesting and negative things to say about everyone else, but he only recited them to the cameramen, thus protecting himself from the younger, more open-minded crowd.
Try to stop being annoying. You might not even realize it, but odds are there are some things about you that anger many other people. Jenna never stopped talking, and her competitors eventually had their say and kicked her off.
These little instructions on life are all well and good, but when money's involved, take everything you've learned so far and toss it in the South China Sea. Sure, "Survivor" taught some simple lessons on improving life, but at its core lies a disturbing truth about the deepest motivations of man. There are some lessons from "Survivor" to be observed but not followed.
Money truly is the root of all evil. Form alliances and pick off your competitors one by one. Individuality doesn't matter in the quest for millions. No one cares what you think. They're either with you till the brutal end, or waiting in the winds to swiftly take you out.
It's greed that makes the same Kelly who claims to take pride in finding out a lot of personal details about others make a statement like, "I don't care about anyone else on this island, I'm all by myself." It's bitterness over the lost chance at the prize money that makes Sue say to Kelly, "If I passed you on the street and you were dying of thirst, I wouldn't help you for the world, but leave you for the vultures."
Some castaways attempted to remain true to themselves. They made genuine friendships and had fun on the island. But the men and women who got caught up in the fun of being stranded together learned the hard way that they shouldn't have been making friends, but making plans to stab those friends in the back. Money is more powerful than morals. Despite Sue's comment that "money and corporate America have no effect on a redneck like me," she made 51 million viewers' jaws drop when she uttered the vicious "vulture" comment.
The million-dollar mask covers how friendly or compassionate you are. Rich, the eventual winner, consistently made horrible comments about his competitors as if they didn't matter. He walked around arrogantly without a thought given to anyone else. But he knew what he was doing. From day one he knew that he'd have to ditch all signs of civility if he were to be the ultimate survivor. Sure, he and his pal Rudy were in it till the end, but that didn't stop him from saying, "I think Rudy should go now." Nothing mattered but the money, and no one knew that more than the one man who arrogantly stomped on everyone else. It's sad when the winner gets awarded for being the best double-crosser.
The quest for the million dollars took its toll on the 16 castaways, and brought out the worst in most of them. They showed America what perhaps many had already suspected -- that in the end all that matters is the good old American dream for cash, and it doesn't matter who gets stepped on along the way. But it doesn't have to happen that way. If the biggest jerk always takes the prize, I'll take runner-up any day.
(Brandon Almond is a Cavalier Daily associate editor.)
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