Top ten reasons to celebrate the end of sorority rush
1. Second-, third- and fourth-year sorority sisters can have their lives back — Jokes! It’s bid week, biddies!
2. Bid week: Nonstop activities to bond with your new sistas — Your social life hasn’t been this busy … well, ever.
3. Forty new besties: The most obvious reason everyone’s glad rush is over. Each chapter welcomes in new girls. Who doesn’t like making new friends?
4. The fight for littles begins. Will your rush crush turn into your little? Who will be the perfect fit for your family? Only the next month or so will tell, but in the mean time, everyone loves a little competition between friends — hordes of women competing for someone’s attention always works so well on The Bachelor!
5. Facebook has become infinitely more interesting. Gone is the winter break sparsity of updates. They’ve been replaced with pictures — infinitely more entertaining. Bonus points: If you’re in a sorority you now have at least 40 more people to stalk. This will keep you busy with legitimate procrastination for at least a day.
6. Crying in first-year dorms will go back to a normal level. Even if rush worked out for you, it probably wasn’t an easy process. There’s almost a 100 percent chance you found yourself on the verge of tears at least once. But now there will be more than enough Kleenex to go around.
7. Frat guys can concentrate on things that really matter. Bros will no longer spend their time deciding what prank to play on the young’uns. What to do when cat-calling and heckling isn’t enough? “But we peed in their rain boots last year, let’s get more creative!” Now, they can concentrate on things that really matter: Natty vs. PBR, who’s going to buy the Solo cups, and what to do for boys’ rush events.
8. Anyone who drives down Rugby will no longer be distracted by throngs of girls. Drivers can go back to concentrating on the road. No longer will they be distracted by contemplations of “snappy casual” or tempted to play Frogger.
9. Pi Chis can reveal their secret identities. In the rare case that your Google search yielded no success, you finally discovered what sorority your recruitment counselor was in. Moreover, she’s no longer suffering from disaffiliation blues, only reveling in reaffiliation bliss.10. Saturday morning Bodo’s dress code has returned. Anyone who went to Bodo’s, or anywhere on the Corner, on Saturday morning dressed in typical weekend clothes probably felt a little underdressed. No more, my friends. Return to the walk-of-shame-home casual rather than “trendy, chic business casual.” Reason has been restored, and all is right with the world.