What exactly is the "O" face? For woman, it could be a sign that she is very aroused or trying very hard to look so. But for a man, it could simply be his lips forming the first two letters of the word "oops." Some see the dreaded "oops" as perhaps the most terrifying of all bedroom noises that a man can produce -- perhaps because it often is a sign he fell a bit short of his goal. Although a man's orgasm may not seem as mysterious as that of his female counterpart, and may be easier to achieve during intercourse, it has its own fair share of complications.
Stop and Recharge
Not everyone understands that a man can have a less obvious orgasm. "Ejaculation and orgasm are two separate things," said Annette Owens, a doctor at the Charlottesville Sexual Health and Wellness Clinic. She explained that "some men can train themselves to have the feeling of orgasm and not ejaculate," also noting that this is something men do not typically do.
Many males do not attempt to distinguish between the two. According to third-year Commerce student Kyle Estep, "Any guy is going to regard [ejaculation and orgasm] as the same thing."
Once a man ejaculates, he enters a refractory period, as described by "Human Sexuality" author J. L. McCary.
"After orgasm, the man enters the refractory period ... the sexual stimulation that was previously effective and pleasurable now becomes unavailing and distasteful," McCary wrote. "Women, on the other hand, usually do not go into a refractory period."
According to Owens, the refractory period gets longer and longer with age.
"A very young man can have an orgasm and ejaculate and a very short time later ejaculate and have another orgasm," she said.
These effects change greatly with time. Owens said a 15-year-old male could ejaculate again within an hour, whereas a 74-year-old male could have to wait as long as two full days.
Oops
Unlike the female orgasm, the difficulty with the male orgasm does not generally lie in the inability to have one. In fact, "The Hite Report on Male Sexuality," authored by sex educator Shere Hite, cited that only 4 percent of men say they do not orgasm regularly during intercourse.
This does not mean, however, that the male orgasm is without its stressors. Hite found that 71 percent of men said they were not able to continue intercourse as long as they would have liked.
She concluded that "a constant source of anxiety among men is whether they continue intercourse long enough, remaining erect, or whether they reach orgasm 'too soon.'"
Though Hite wrote it is not mandatory for a man to have a sustained erection, she did cite different ways men got around these problems -- including learning through masturbation, masturbating before intercourse or having a second session. Other tactics include using ointment, halting movement, finding a less stimulating position, withdrawing or simply using condoms.
Hite acknowledged that many men feel pressure to have sex for longer so that the woman will have an orgasm. She noted, however, that "most women do not orgasm simply from intercourse."
Going the distance
"The goal is to last longer," says third-year Commerce student Ryan Sheppard. "Most guys' goal is to get the girl off."
Estep had a different view.
"It depends if I care about the girl," he said. "Of course, the guy would like the girl to, but he only has a vested interest if he cares for her."
But just as there is societal pressure for women to have orgasms from intercourse, men feel similar pressures to "perform" well.
According to Hite, while men are pressured to attain and maintain an erection, she found that "most men had experienced difficulty having an erection at some time."
Her data showed that men responded to having difficulty with an erection 39 percent infrequently -- whereas 17 percent sometimes and 13 percent regularly or always had difficulty. Hite also noted that men who had trouble with an erection with their partners did not have these problems when masturbating alone.
Drinking Curve
Hite offered many explanations for difficulty with erection. Alcohol, drugs and/or fatigue were the primary reasons he cited, while the second most common reason was emotional upset or anxiety. Other reasons included not wanting sex as much, having a new partner as well as performance fears.
But could alcohol consumption actually improve a man's ability to last longer? Some said they think so.
Estep perceived that large alcohol intake does not improve sexual endurance. He described a "drinking curve" on a "sliding scale," meaning that the effects of alcohol on sexual performance are relative to the volume of alcohol consumed.
"If you've had up to eight drinks and you're getting kind of drunk, you're going to last long," Estep said, noting that for him, additional drinks are detrimental.
This article originally concluded with a quote by an anonymous student whose identifying information was included in a quote removed before publication. This version no longer features any quotes from that student.
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