With the presidential election less than two months away, it seems that everywhere I go I’m faced with the rivalry between Barack Obama and John McCain. Students at football games vehemently place stickers on their floral sundresses and the pockets of their Brooks Brothers oxfords. I can’t escape Newcomb without being accosted by at least three people asking if I’m registered to vote in Charlottesville. (The answer is no, but my eighth-grade civics teacher would be proud that I’ve requested an absentee ballot.) A makeshift Obama office was even resurrected in the vacant space next to Just Curry on the Corner. Yet I don’t feel that this rivalry is the greatest the University faces; instead, there’s the intense competition that is Little John’s versus Christian’s Pizza.
We all know the feeling (perhaps a little too well). It’s 2 a.m. on a Thursday, and we’re tired from a night crawling bars on the Corner, making appearances at various fraternity parties and/or working through a week’s worth of reading. And we’re hungry. We must choose between a slice of crispy, cheesy heaven or an oversized deli sandwich (obviously taking into consideration that it’ll come with the world’s most incredible chips). This dilemma is difficult, and one that taxes me weekly. Or daily. I can’t help but compare it to the choice our country faces in November.
The decision between Little John’s and Christian’s is all-important (or at least seems that way at 2 a.m.). Sometimes I’ll be walking home with my roommate, Wild Turkey in hand, and see herds of others clutching those white pizza boxes, and I feel regret. I made the wrong choice. I know how crummy that feels — imagine how terrible I’ll feel walking out of the voting booth thinking I checked the wrong box. In that case, I may just get a sandwich and a slice of pizza to soothe myself and call it a day.
The restaurants actually resemble the candidates. My personal analogy is that Christian’s is to Obama as Little John’s is to McCain. Obama is certainly the younger candidate, and Christian’s just opened on the Corner last fall. Neither has been around very long, but both have already gained extraordinary amounts of support, popularity and enthusiasm. Little John’s, quite the contrary, is an ancient establishment; a little-known fact is that it was conceptualized by Jefferson, who initially wanted it as the focal point of his Academical Village. We are all accustomed to Little John’s being on the Corner, just like McCain has been a part of politics since the signing of the Constitution.
The appearances of the eateries have parallels to the candidates as well. Christian’s furniture is sleek, like Obama’s fashionable suits. The wooden décor and warm lighting of Little John’s is traditional and nurturing, like trusty old McCain. Little John’s exterior also eases seamlessly into the foundation of the Corner; McCain is similarly indistinguishable amongst rotund, white-haired politicians. Christian’s is more flamboyant; the bright lights are like a beacon of hope after a long night. Many Americans have that same light-at-the-end-of—the-(Bush) tunnel feeling about Obama.
However, Little John’s is more dependable, as it’s open 24 hours, while Christian’s closes at three (and even earlier during the week). Christian’s innovative toppings like artichokes and pineapples may appeal to adventurous palates, but who doesn’t love turkey, bacon, ham, cheese and bread (consequently all the makings of a Five Easy Pieces)? Yet Little John’s recently branched out with a flatbread menu, even adding a white cheese pizza to the menu (similar to McCain’s attempt to win crossovers by picking Palin as his running mate). And in a recession, it would be dumb to overlook prices; a slice of Christian’s rarely surpasses $3 while you might break a 10 at Little John’s. It’s kind of like McCain’s appeal to the richer demographic and Obama’s tax cuts for the poor.
My goal here isn’t to endorse a certain candidate. My loyalties shift between restaurants; I see the merits of both. There might even be a third option. The random Green Party candidate can always mix it up, like the rash decision to go for a Gus Burger in the wee hours of the morning, a common mistake of first-years and one that disgusts some upon seeing the grittiness of the White Spot in the light of day. But the similarities are hard to ignore (McCain and Little John’s even share a surname). Just before you step into the voting booth, think as long and as hard as you did four nights before on the Corner, because this choice just might be bigger.
Abigail’s column runs biweekly Fridays. She can be reached at a.coster@cavalierdaily.com.
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