I'll admit I am completely guilty of tuning out my parents the second they open their mouths to give me any kind of advice. It doesn't matter if their advice might be potentially beneficial to me, because at this age I'm thoroughly convinced I somehow know it all - well, at least more than they do. But after getting my hair cut Saturday afternoon, a little voice in the back of my head prodded me to give more consideration to their wise words than I normally would.
I walked in to the Hair Cuttery in Barracks Road Shopping Center, and chances are I probably would not have been there if I simply had thought more about the lessons my parents had attempted to teach me. What wise words could parents possibly have to share with their kids about the simple act of getting their hair cut? More useful lessons can be applied to this particular situation than you might think.
My parents are all about eating at nice, fancy restaurants or trying new ones, but regardless of where we go, my father is always adamant about ensuring that we get the best table available. Often times, I roll my eyes when he does this, wondering why he has to hassle the hostess so much with this request. Why can't he just accept the table where we are initially seated? Recently, I've realized maybe I should have been paying attention rather than rolling my eyes.
As I sat in the hair salon, my mind flashed back to a hair cut I had gotten couple of weeks ago. Looking at my new do in the mirror, which was still wet from the shampoo rinse, I was caught off guard when the hair stylist suddenly unsnapped the hair cut cape from around my neck and motioned me to follow her to the cash register so I could pay. For a second I was utterly confused. Wasn't she going to blow dry my hair? As she walked to the front of the store in order to ring me up, I realized that she clearly had no intention of blow drying my hair. Before making my way to the front of the store, I hesitated, desperately wishing she would blow dry my hair. I mean that is the whole point of going to get your hair cut; it is one of the few times during the year my hair actually looks decent. No matter how hard I may try at home, my hair never will look as smooth and voluminous as it does after going to the hair salon. Walking out of the salon I felt disappointed; there was no extra bounce in my step from the confidence my new haircut potentially could have inspired because my hair looked about as good as it always does.
As I drove away, I realized I should have said something to the hair stylist. I was a paying customer and it was her job to ensure that I was happy and satisfied so that I might come back again. In that moment back at the salon, I had frozen. Although I knew I should have said something to her, for some reason I felt guilty about it and was afraid that I might offend her. My people-pleasing tendencies advised me against it, so I kept my mouth shut. Suddenly, I wished that I had my dad's assertiveness to speak up and get what I deserved. Previously I had considered his assertiveness annoying; now I realized there was nothing wrong with making such requests. In the future, I'll have to push aside the guilt and fear holding me back, and understand that I was not being burdensome but simply making the business uphold the commitment it had made by agreeing to perform this particular service for me. As much as I hate to admit it, my dad's advice and example was more helpful than I originally gave him credit for. Now I understand how important, as a customer, it is to speak up.
You can't expect people to read your mind or always uphold their service commitment. It is your responsibility to use your voice.
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Kristin's column runs biweekly Thursdays. She can be reached at k.ulmer@cavalierdaily.com.
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