1. Piano practice rooms In case you’ve never really explored Old Cabell — besides that time you had to sit in there for Days on the Lawn — there are some little piano practice rooms in the basement that are small, secluded and virtually soundproof. You face away from the glass door when you sit at the piano, so no one will be able to see the tears streaming down your face because of March Madness bracket. You don’t even have to bring sheet music, and your heaving will just look like you’re really into your playing. Maybe you can even blast some sad piano music on your phone in case anyone gets too close to the door and to increase the ambiance. 2. Landscaping of Arts Grounds If you walk past Campbell Hall and the rest of the A-School buildings, you will find yourself looking at some sculptures and a whole bunch of plants, so why not lay down in the tall grass and lament your sorrows? It can be hard finding out that the person you swore was your soulmate is in a relationship. Maybe you arrived to your midterm 15 minutes late and missed an entire question — this may have happened to me — and it’s too much to hold in until you get home. Arts Grounds is right beside some frats, and there is always new litter after they hold a party. So, maybe you’ll be lucky enough to found a half-empty Natty Light to help you forget your blunders. 3. Clem 1 I have a theory that Clem 1 is not a real place, like the 19th floor in those Wayside School books. There’s something about the ancient furniture and fluorescent lights that causes a level of dissociation like no other. It exists on an entirely different plane of reality than the rest of the world, so if you go cry there — it’ll be like it didn’t happen at all. Everyone down in there is also suffering at the thought of all the impending tests, exams and projects that come with the end of the year, so you’re likely to gain some sympathetic looks. If nothing else, at least no one will bother you. 4. The Chapel If you’re one of those people who’s really good at silent crying, then the Chapel is for you. If anyone comes in and sees you hunched over in one of the pews, there is no way they are going to bother you for fear of interrupting a prayer or meditation or plea to the universe. Just be careful you don’t fly into the Chapel on the day of a wedding or sorority initiation because that would be even worse than just standing outside and wailing at every passerby. 5. The pool If you must cry but you also need to get your daily workout in, then head on down to the AFC or North Grounds pool and just happen to get chlorine in your eyes. I honestly don’t know how we opened our eyes underwater when we were kids because that stuff stings like crazy now, but luckily that works to your advantage for once. If anyone asks what’s wrong, instead of explaining to them that your pet fish just died, tell them that your eyes are really sensitive to chlorine and you forgot your goggles today. They won’t think twice about it. 6. The biology greenhouse This nifty, little trick works similarly to the pool excuse, but instead of chlorine bothering your eyes, it’s all the pollen in the air. In fact, you don’t even have to go inside the biology greenhouse to get away with crying these days with all the plants waking up and distributing their weird plant dandruff everywhere. But if you don’t want anyone to hear your sobs, then it’s probably best to head into the greenhouse anyways. Not to mention, I’ve never seen anyone in there so your chances of being disturbed are actually pretty low. Cry as long and as hard as you want! 7. Trin Contrary to that Camila Cabello song, there should be crying in the club because that is the best place to do it. If you’ve been in Trin on the weekends, you know that it is one hot mess of bodies, awful house music and sticky floors. With all of these distractions combined with the extremely drunk patrons, no one will notice you crying into your drink at the thought of that test you just failed or your lost JUUL — which is definitely something to be crying about, if you ask me. You can always retake a class, but you can never get back that 50 bucks. 8. The Bodo’s line The Bodo’s line can be daunting each morning. It seems like you always run into your nemesis, last three exes and a professor while you’re just trying to blend in enough to get your bagel and get out the door. One way to ensure none of these people will try to talk to you is to have tears streaming down your face. Sure, it will be embarrassing at first, but everyone will have forgotten by the end of the day, and you will be pacified with a delicious breakfast. Bonus points if you’re also hungover and willing to cry in line. 9. Newcomb Dining Hall So if you cry in Newcomb, you will be in front of a bunch of people, but most importantly, you will be in front of Miss Kathy, and I’m sure she will do whatever is in her power to make you feel better. Also, dining halls are usually 75 percent first years, and it’s important to give them a taste of what being an upperclassman is like. Perhaps, they’ll even take pity on you and swipe you in. If you’re lucky, no one will question why you’re crying because they’ll automatically assume you’re upset over how under-seasoned the food is once again. 10. Your bed I can’t think of a better place to wallow than your bed, honestly. It has everything you could ever need, and I can guarantee that your laptop is close by. Maybe you can watch videos of cute little puppies that are just too dang small or people doing good deeds and just have a day to yourself to ugly cry. Or maybe the thought of getting out of bed and sitting through boring classes is enough to make you cry, and you don’t need the videos at all. Either way, enjoy your mental health day and let it all out.