The Cavalier Daily
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Dockter Duval's Advice Column

The advice column feature is brand new to the Cavalier Daily. Here are some sample questions asked to candidates trying out for the CD's advice columnist position. For next week, please send your own, real advice columnist questions and comments to advice@cavalierdaily.com

Dear Advice Columnist:

My roommate has a hygiene problem. She showers almost every day, but fails to wash her sheets. Sometimes she opts for coco-mango oil to freshen up, the smell of which makes me nauseous. Her offenses are not enough of a reason to kick her out or request a roommate change, but how can I approach her with this substantial problem without making it awkward to live five feet away from her afterwards?

Sincerely, Nauseous

Dear Nauseous,

You can either go about solving your problem passively or aggressively. The passive approach includes subtle offhand comments that might provoke Ms. Coco-Mango to change her ways. For example, next time she asks you how classes are going respond with, "I'm sorry, I can smell you but I can't hear you," and throw in a random comment about how coconuts make you vomit. If this is a bit too abrupt, say how terrible you feel for so-and-so down the hall because that girl's roommate reeks and never washes her bed sheets. Yes, mind games are a bit childish, but then again, so is putting your roommate through olfactory hell. The other option is the aggressive course of action where you actively change your roommate's ways.

If you want to be "mature" about it (even though maturity is way overrated), you could buy other oils to help her out. It might sound mean, but you're probably not the only one who breathes through your mouth when you see her, much in the same way everyone at a party notices that one guy who wears enough cologne to knock out a small village.

As for the funky bed sheets, offer to wash them for her when you clean yours, or "accidentally" spill something on her bed making it absolutely necessary to clean them. Actually, better yet, if you ever have to throw up, aim for her bed. This way you get a release and she gets her sheets cleaned -- two birds with one stone, can't beat that.

Dear Advice Columnist:

I am a 5' 6" female who weighs 125 lbs. I feel fat. I exercise and try to eat right, but I just can't lose weight. If I binge drink, I can throw up to get the alcohol out of my system. I've started trying to throw up after meals too, but I feel awful every time I try because I know it is wrong. What can I do to lose those extra five pounds?

Sincerely, Dieter

Dear Dieter,

Let's start at the top. You are not overweight. You're also not a boxer or a wrestler, so why are you trying to make the 120-pound weight class? There is nothing beneficial about randomly losing five pounds and it also is not the answer to a tight body. If you eat well, exercise and lift some weights, you will maintain your health and be more toned, both of which are far more important than the magic number 120.

As it stands, being 5'6" and 125 pounds, you are at a very healthy body weight by nutritional standards, and if you want to tone up a bit more, exercise is the only real answer. By throwing up after meals to lose five pounds, you will inevitably look and feel unhealthy.

The problem is that college is a breeding ground for a world of anorexia and eating disorders, sadly disguised by tight-fitting black pants and pastel-colored button-up shirts that make some college boys giddy. Often times popular culture has made us think we are seeing tight, toned and healthy bodies when, tragically, some of those individuals are obsessed with shrinking themselves even at the expense of their health.

Bingeing and purging, or starvation of any sort are never the answer, and ironically often end with large weight gain along with psychological and physical damage to your mind and body. Skinny is not synonymous with attractive, and more importantly, not with being a healthy person either - concentrate on being healthy and fit, not on making the weight.

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