What's the deal with ISIS? I have been trying to get onto it for the last two days, and it keeps telling me that the maximum number of users has been exceeded. Forgive me if I betray the poverty of my imagination, but how much money could the University have possibly saved by eliminating the phone-accessible ISIS system? It provided a quick and easy way to administer classes, the necessity of which is obvious in the aftermath of its abolition. Lacking printer paper in the library is bad enough; not being able to interact efficiently with ISIS is ridiculous. Maybe instead of budgeting $100,000 to impose a mandatory diversity training program that has no hope of achieving any type of progress, the University should take care of its students' basic needs.
-- Phone Frustration
To the jackass who towed my white Jeep Grand Cherokee from the Wade Apartments on Wertland: it's the first week of school. I was helping my friend move, and we went out to dinner. I hope you're happy you could park a whole 20 yards closer to your apartment, you selfish prick. Screw you.
-- Nice Guy Finishes Last
A barrage of confused faces stare at various points in the windowless, crowded room. Why do they always give the crap rooms to English classes -- you'd think that since most English professors you meet seem among the brightest people you know, they would be competent to choose good rooms. But they always end up in some crowded, depressing hole with institutional paint which only lacks padded walls to give you that real feeling of comfort. Maybe this is why English majors seem to be such closet cases -- they have been intellectually reared in closets.
-- Bring English Out of the Closet
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