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Dealing with Mr. (or Mrs.) Right

When Rebecca Elaine Brooks watches "Sex and the City," she does not identify with Carrie and the girls in their pursuit for "Mr. Right." Instead, Brooks finds herself occasionally missing the throes and excitement of being a single woman surrounded by her girlfriends.

Brooks, a fourth-year Nursing student, was married this past summer to her British boyfriend of two years. Now that they live together, she finds herself missing the close female companionship typical of students.

"Sometimes I do miss living with my girlfriends, and when I go out, I wish they were here to help me pick out my clothing," Brooks said.

To some, marrying young may seem like a relic of the past or appear overly rash or idealistic. Ironically, many choose to ignore the most obvious answer for early marriages -- love.

"People either assume that we're either super-religious or some kind of hicks," said fourth-year College student Suzy Hudgins Gunn, who married her high school sweetheart the summer after her second year.

"I want to tell them that we're normal, too!" Suzy laughed.

Suzy and Alan Gunn, who have known each other since the first grade, entered the University together after having dated since their junior prom. One night in her first year when Suzy went out with her hallmates, she invited her boyfriend to join them. Alan declined, only to reappear at the party several hours later.

"I would look out of the window at the frat, and he'd just be standing there outside, just watching after me," Suzy said.

Alan shrugged.

"Well, she's a small girl," he said. "Someone needed to look after her."

For the pair, the question of marriage was simply a natural progression in their relationship. In high school, Alan had chauffeured Suzy to and from her dance practices, and they both said that this maturity contributed to their relationship's depth, which is uncommon for their age.

When the couple was married, Suzy's father, a priest, conducted the ceremony in his own backyard and gave them his fullest blessing.

"My parents were thrilled," Suzy said.

Alan's parents, however, experienced more trepidation about the news.

"My parents were a bit more apprehensive," Alan said. "They thought that Suzy would get pregnant right away and that we'd have to live out of a dumpster or something."

Being married in college is not as stress-free as some might assume. Still dependent on their parents for economic support, married students struggle to sustain independence as families.

Exams, papers and impending deadlines thread another strain into the relationship, especially when the partner is not in school. Many couples agreed that compromise, along with an undulated sense of selflessness, is the necessary cornerstone in their relationships.

"We have to schedule time definitely to see each other," third-year Nursing student Ruth Gamon said of her fiancé. "Usually every Wednesday night we make a date, and then at least one day of the weekend we will spend together."

The Gunns similarly negotiate their individual interests for the best collective interests. Suzy said she had wanted to study abroad in Germany for an extended period of time, possibly a year, but keeping Alan in mind, she sacrificed that desire, instead opting for the summer when both of them could go together.

Brooks stressed that selflessness and care make her marriage work well.

"It's all about taking care of each other," she said. "If he knows that I have a test and I'm stressed, he'll do all the work -- he'll wash the dishes and make dinner. ... It's always thinking about the other person, never being selfish and always being concerned with each other."

The prevalent "hookup" culture here may make it seem impossible that love

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