The Cavalier Daily
Serving the University Community Since 1890

Letters to my discussion section crush

It was love at first sight

Earlier this semester I found myself tangled in a romance that I can only describe as “short yet painful,” which, funnily enough, is the same way I would describe discussion sections. Discussion sections, as University students all know, are classes where you are tested on the things you learned during lecture. Or, at least the things you were supposed to have learned during lecture if you hadn’t been beating yourself up over not getting the Wordle instead. Honestly, if your discussion section doesn’t count attendance, is there even any point in going? Well, yes. That is if you have found yourself a discussion section crush. 

Now without further ado, here are my Hilary Duff’s “A Cinderella Story”-esque letters to that so-called crush.

Jan. 24.

Dear Discussion Section Crush,

The first time I walked into discussion, I was a bit nervous about whether or not I would like the class. But that worry was thrown out the window when I saw your gorgeous face. If Handsome Squidward had a better-looking twin, it would be you. Sure I wasn’t able to see the entirety of your face because of your mask, but I could just tell you were a sight to see. No longer was I worried about discussing what the teaching assistant was talking about. All I wanted to discuss was whether or not you liked long walks on the beach and what shampoo you used. Your hair smelled great. 

Anyway, it was great meeting you.

Sincerely,

Your secret admirer

P.S. Just to make it clear, I was not actively sniffing you, I just happened to be sitting close enough to be able to smell your hair.

Feb. 7.

Hola Discussion Section Crush,

Has anyone ever told you that you are so very smart? That point you made this week about how we live in a society — genius. I’ve never heard anything like that before. And when you mentioned the fact that octopuses have three hearts, my mind was blown. Hmmm, maybe you’re even smart enough to figure out who I am? Well, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.

See you next week,

The Roxanne to your Megamind — aka your secret admirer

P.S. If I was an octopus, would you have stolen all three of my hearts instead of just the one you did? 

Feb. 21.

Discussion Section Crush,

How dare you not show up to class this week. Do you know how long it took me to pick out the perfect outfit and style my hair? Hours! Only for me to show up to discussion and you not even being there. I don’t care if you were sick or didn’t do the week's reading, you should have shown up. I can’t be the only one contributing to this relationship, you know that right? What a waste of an outfit. I may have let a lot of things slide, such as the fact that you still don’t know my name, but this is where I draw the line. I don’t think I can do this anymore.

Oh, who am I kidding? I can’t stay mad at you. Okay, I’ll forgive you for this one, but don’t disappoint me again. I guess I’ll just have to find a new, even better outfit to wear for next class.

I better see you next week,

Your secret, yet vocal, admirer

P.S. Maybe you should consider dressing up too. The t-shirt and jeans vibe is cute, but you could do better.

March 7.

Dear Ex Discussion Section Crush,

I am sorry but I think we might have to break things off. I know that over the past few weeks we have been getting close, with you finally realizing that my name is Wardah and not Bertha, as well as those few glances we shared in class, but I just feel like this relationship has become one-sided and I am not getting the effort I deserve. I’m sorry, but I think this is for the best.

I’ll see you around,

Your no longer secret admirer, Wardah

P.S. My sudden disinterest has nothing to do with the fact that I saw you without a mask the other day. 

And with that, my romance came to a close. I wish I could say it was worth it, but it really wasn’t. I did, however, learn three valuable things — relationships are hard, going to discussion sections does actually help your understanding of the material learned in lecture and octopuses have three hearts.

Comments