“People come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn,” Glinda sings to Elphaba in the emotional song “For Good” toward the end of the musical “Wicked.”
After seeing the movie “Wicked” in theaters back in the fall, I started listening to the soundtrack while going about my daily routine, particularly loving “I'm Not That Girl” and, of course, “Defying Gravity.” As all of these songs began to melt into memorization, this “For Good” lyric, which will be featured in the second-half of the film adaptation, stood out to me the most. It not only resonated with me, but with my friends, too, and helped us feel to put various college tribulations into perspective.
College is universally hyped up to be “the best years of your life.” In this environment, however, I’ve found that it can be hard to understand that not everything is meant to be long-lasting. All too often, people — including myself — get so attached to the idea of “forever” that we miss the value of short-term experiences. As the song suggests, just because something is not everlasting doesn’t mean it doesn’t serve a purpose.
I first used this lyric as a piece of advice earlier this spring, when my friend confided in me about losing touch with her first-year roommate. Though my friend had tried to become friends with her roommate, like many first-year pairs, their differences proved to be too great. Ultimately, they decided to live apart the following year. Now, they pass each other on the street as if they are strangers.
While this may seem like a total failure of a roommate experience — and my friend certainly thought so — my favorite song lyric predictably came to mind. I explained to her that while her former roommate may not have been a forever friend, they served an important purpose in my friend’s life, having taught each other how to get along with peers who are polar-opposite and fostering greater adaptability. Indeed, her roommate was not meant to be her best friend, but as Elphaba would concur, she came into her life for a reason.
This semester, I’ve had to use my own advice when dealing with my first personal experience with the universal college situationship. I had been hanging out with a guy for well over a month, and I did not see it ending — actually, I’d thought I was entering my “lover girl” era. Unfortunately, the guy did not share that same sentiment. After I had already become deeply, deeply attached, he wound up making a dramatic exit out of my life.
Hurt and struggling to understand the “why” of it all, I turned on “For Good.” And without fail, the lyrics helped me realize that though this man clearly wasn’t “my person,” I believe that he came into my life to teach me how to move on — a lesson long overdue. Because of him, I felt much better prepared for whatever romance I was to encounter next.
In addition to the social situations this advice has helped me navigate, it also benefits me academically. When I wound up with a stickler professor, I expected to spend the whole semester cranky and stressed about my grade. However, while my friends can attest that my mood may not have been sunshine and roses straight after leaving his class, I now know to feel extra grateful for each beloved professor I’ve had since. Plus, he definitely forced me to adopt a few study habits that I gladly implement today.
It all comes back to being reminded again and again how true Glinda was in what she so eloquently explained to Elphaba. Though people’s chapter in your life may close, your relationship with them was rarely a waste. I have not always known what each purpose is right away or been able to expertly assist my friends in their quest for answers, but I firmly believe that there always is one.
Next time you’re sad and perhaps wondering why someone entered your life only to exit shortly after, remember that everyone comes into your life for a reason.
And, pay close attention to the lyrics of your favorite song — with any luck, you may just find your next best piece of advice.
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