Obama Advertisements
Obama criticizes McCain’s and the federal government’s mortgage plan
Does this ad sound unfamiliar? That’s because it didn’t air very long. Released in September, Obama’s attack ad criticized McCain for stating that, as president, he would “order the Secretary of Treasury to buy up the bad home loan mortgages in America immediately.” A few days after its release, Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson and the Federal Reserve took control of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, the two largest mortgage holders in the nation. Just more than a week after that, the Fed bailed out American International Group Inc. with what is now equivalent to $122.8 billion.
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize that McCain’s suggestion, which Obama chose to ridicule, turned out to mirror the moves taken and deemed necessary by the majority of government officials less than a month later precisely. Should Obama have scorned the U.S. Treasury or Federal Reserve as well? Obama has tried to maintain his anti-Wall Street image ever since he decided to run for president. Unfortunately, what some have labeled a young and inexperienced senator may have yet to realize is that helping big business can also mean helping the state of the economy, the nation’s stability and the middle class (politics’ favorite demographic).
Joe Biden — look up to him, vote for him, pray to him
Despite my avid support for Senator McCain in the 2008 election, I happen to be a somewhat-closeted Joe Biden fan. Nevertheless, Biden is no different from all other candidates when it comes to political ads. In my favorite Biden commercial, a full minute is devoted to the eulogizing (read: glorifying) of the Delaware senator.
The first 15 seconds make the argument that, because Biden would commute daily to and from work on Amtrak, he is a great man and a great leader. What it doesn’t tell you is that Biden’s son, Hunter, happens to also be on the board of Amtrak. Apparently, Biden spends all his time on the train eavesdropping as a way to better understand the nation’s family concerns. Thankfully, the ad reminds us that “Joe Biden has never forgotten where he came from.” First Scranton, Penn. and then Wilmington, Del. (which, in reality, are not nearly as rough as Biden would like to imagine). Oh, and this “project baby’s” grandfather was a member of the Pennsylvania State Senate.
Only by asking us to deify Biden with all our bodies, hearts and souls could the ad have gone further than it did. But not to fret, for I am nevertheless confident that Biden still thinks of himself as a god among men.
A collection of cars that is 23 percent foreign-made — just about the only part of John McCain that is not 100 percent American
My favorite political ad attacking McCain is Obama’s criticism of his rival’s car collection. It scorns McCain for owning three foreign vehicles out of his 13-car collection. To anyone who can do simple math, that still means he owns 10 American-made cars. For most people, that’s a heck of a lot of Detroit-manufactured vehicles. So what if less than a quarter of his cars come from overseas?
Is Obama trying to say McCain is being unsupportive of America? I guess 22 years of military service, being taken as a prisoner of war and undergoing North Vietnamese torture wasn’t enough. Or maybe Obama thinks McCain is trying to harm the domestic automobile industry. But what harms the industry that employs the 16th most individuals in the United States more — buying three foreign automobiles, or greatly increasing the industry’s corporate taxes?
If the American public buys into such ludicrous arguments, then I don’t blame Obama, his campaign or politics as usual for the prospective disappointing American future ... I blame us.
McCain Advertisements
It has been one of the most entertaining presidential campaign in history — and there are still five days until the actual election. Lipstick on pigs, months of pantsuits, Chuck Norris campaigning for the Republican Party ... what comes next? What can we expect, from either side, if the only image international audiences sees right now is horrible advertising? If corporate America can understand the dos and don’ts of “good ads sell more,” why can’t political candidates? (Let’s disregard the fact that corporate America is currently the country’s biggest embarrassment).
While I’m sure both sides are throwing out conniving advertisements faster than Ben Roethlisberger throws interceptions, I can’t help but noticing that Republican candidate John McCain’s ads are not only manipulative but complete jokes. If he thinks the majority of Americans are buying what he’s selling, perhaps (for the country’s sake), he’ll end up broke Nov. 4.
Celebrity
We all know this one. John McCain, represented by his oily female voiceover, compares Democratic nominee Barack Obama to shallow, hapless celebs Britney Spears and Paris Hilton. While crowds chant “Obama! Obama!” voiceover lady ponders whether Obama is “ready to lead.” Well, obviously not if “higher taxes, more foreign oil” is the real Obama. If Obama is indeed the biggest celebrity in the world, at least he doesn’t flash his whoo-ha for the cameras. Thanks Obama! Maybe we need a celebrity to make decisions; at least a celebrity would look fabulous doing it!
The Pump
This time, our creepy voiceover lady is as sly as ever. While an artsy-looking shot of an antique gas pump floats on and off the screen, we hear that same old “Obama! Obama!” chant McCain favors. As the viewer watches in horror as the gas price rises higher and higher, voiceover lady purrs in our ear: “Who can you thank for rising prices at the pump?” As we wonder along with her, “Obama!” chants grow louder, more threatening, in the background. Then, suddenly! Obama’s grinning — no, leering — face flashes across the screen! That’s who we should blame! That man, right there! The creepy voiceover lady said so! Didn’t she? Come on McCain. Grow up and say outright that it’s Obama’s fault, but please don’t use subliminal messaging. And change that voiceover lady!
Kindergarten Sex
OK, we finally found one without the creepy voice! This time, a kind old man voices for McCain, what a relief! What’s that you’re saying, old man? Obama doesn’t do anything for schools? We see pictures of Obama looking sheepish, looking bored, looking exactly like I looked as a kindergartener, not comprehending a thing my teacher is telling me. As we hear criticism from extremely reliable news sources (the Post, the Chicago Tribune), we learn a shocking fact: Obama wants to teach kindergarteners about sex? What kind of freak is this man?? Someone save America! Oh wait. After a simple Google search of “Obama kindergarten sex,” several sources explaining that Obama wants to teach kindergarteners about inappropriate touching as a defense mechanism against pedophilia. Oh. Touching. No condoms, no bananas. Oh. Well, in that case. I mean, touching is not really sex ... right Palin? And by the way, don’t parents feel a little offended when McCain’s ad says, “Learning about sex before learning to read?” Isn’t that assuming that parents are neglecting the education of their children? I don’t know about you, but I definitely went into kindergarten knowing how to read. But maybe I’m just special. I’m sure that’s what Obama would say.
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