Once a year, Walmarts across the United States become jungles.
In Tallahassee, Fl., someone shot two people over an empty spot in the parking lot. In Georgia, a riot nearly erupted when shoppers descended upon boxes of smartphones. Police arrested a woman in Altamonte Springs, Fl. after causing a disturbance in the cashier line. In 2008, shoppers in Valley Stream, N.Y. trampled down an employee to death when they mad-rushed inside the store during its opening.
The images I’ve described above are emblematic of the consumerist frenzy the entire country experiences at this time of year. This violence is completely incongruous with the warm and fuzzy familial atmosphere that the holidays are supposed to embody. We don’t imagine a tyrannical Santa Claus who runs an elf sweatshop; we imagine a jolly Santa, a graceful master of a fun and lively workshop. The Santa myth is the picture of the holidays to which we want to aspire. So why are we, the real gift-givers, so failing to uphold the Santa spirit of happy giving?
That we have found a way to turn the innocuous activity of gift-giving into a vicious sport cannot be explained solely by people’s desire to find presents for their family and friends. There is an absurdity in punching a man just to get your son a video game that I hope runs through the mind of shoppers, and yet fights in the line are still old hat. People do not behave this way solely because of the desire to give gifts; rather they behave this way because the season provides an excuse to be so crassly materialistic. Under the guise of giving the things they buy to someone else — or perhaps they see Christmas as an opportunity to splurge for themselves — people indulge themselves in being shopaholics, often leaving their wallets empty and their credit cards maxed out. We forgive consumerist hysteria during this time of the year because it is such a prevalent part of our culture; however, that does not make it any less detrimental to the so-called holiday spirit, which is quite the opposite of hysteria.
Of course giving and receiving presents in themselves do not go against the holiday spirit, but certainly the way it is conducted matters. Done in the wrong way, it becomes an orgy of materialism; done in the right way, it is a fulfilling experience. The guiding principle should be this: it’s the thought that counts. Sure, getting something you need or want is great, but if you don’t, don’t let that fact ruin your holidays. People are busy and have tight wallets these days; if it’s apparent that your relatives and friends have done their best to give you something, then be grateful for that. On the flip side, if you are giving gifts, do not feel pressured to buy something that you cannot afford. The importance of a gift to a person is more about its usefulness or poignancy than its price tag. Give a bookworm nephew some Stephen King novels, and he will appreciate it; give him some fancy eu de cologne from Macy’s and he’ll plaster a fake smile as you hand him the gift.
Holiday consumerism taken to its logical extreme, which is what we often experience during Christmas and beyond, cannot be reconciled with the holiday spirit. Pick one, and one only; you cannot have both. Would you like to spend your December stressed out, panicking, short of cash and temper, wishing that the damned season be over so that you can get back to your regular life? Or would you rather spend a nice evening at home, sipping hot drinks over lively conversation, exchanging gifts more as a bonding experience than as a way to get cool new things?
I hope the choice is obvious. The holidays should be an antidote to the frenetic and often disconnecting pace of modern life. ‘Tis the season to slow down, contemplate, be together and reclaim that childhood sense of enchantment — the feeling that the world is a wonderful and beautiful place — that we so often forget. If you feel yourself giving in to the hysteria of holiday shopping, please remind yourself of this: the greatest gift you can give your family members and friends is to just be with them. Life is short, life is precious; in the end you will cherish your memories with your loved ones more than you will cherish the material things they gave you.
Rolph Recto’s column appears Wednesdays in The Cavalier Daily. He can be reached at r.recto@cavalierdaily.com.
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