While many University students are spending their spring breaks escaping the bitter cold that’s dominated Grounds for the last few weeks — electing for exotic destinations like Cabo or San Juan — this spring break, I’ve decided to simply return back home, hoping to beat back some of the “prodigal daughter” allegations I frequently receive from my family.
Although I am not particularly excited to be greeted with the similarly cold weather of my Virginia hometown, I am looking forward to a week to simply relax and reset from the business of these first few months of the spring semester. After picking up a new job, becoming more involved in some of my extracurriculars and taking a bit of a heavier courseload, this break couldn’t come at a better moment in the semester.
Going home for break often brings a slew of horrors — hometown horrors, as I like to refer to them. Included on the list of these is every Walmart trip turning into a high school reunion, bumping into my ex-boyfriend at Starbucks and bedrotting in my childhood bedroom for ungodly amounts of time while my mom vacuums upstairs. Yet, perhaps the scariest phenomenon for me is realizing the call that comes from inside the house — I’m reverting back to my pre-college teenage self.
While I am definitely trying to keep some of my brattier teenage tendencies at bay this spring break and avoid complete regression into my moody 17-year-old self, I have decided to take a different approach towards this regression and consciously appreciate certain aspects of its temporary nature.
Often, one of my first symptoms of teenage deja vu is having a renewed passion for my old interests and hobbies. And while watching a criminal amount of “Stranger Things” edits or spending much of my time building Lego sets may not be the most exciting of winter break plans, I have given in and accepted the cringe.
When I’m at the University, I often neglect my hobbies due to the need to study, maintain a social life and work. At home, however, it seems as though I have an outlandish amount of free time to simply honor all the whims and interests of my 13-year-old self. After all, how many opportunities will I have in my adult life to simply indulge unabashedly in my former interests in the comfort of my childhood bed?
Another aspect of this regression I’ve decided to embrace — albeit, not wholeheartedly— is the complete unproductivity and laziness that overtakes me whenever I am home for break. I spend many a night in, taking unnecessarily long hot showers and watching Netflix in my bed without the demands of school, work or extracurriculars on my time.
While I do sometimes feel guilty for not “accomplishing” much during this time, I think that this departure from the hyperproductivity and busyness of my life at the University is not only okay, but is much needed. Having a brief period of “laziness” during mid-semester isn’t reflective of my ambition or productivity in the long term and has allowed me to reset before finishing up the spring semester.
Beyond my bedrotting at home, I’ve also decided to take advantage of being back in my hometown to revisit some of my favorite spots. While I don’t exactly love that leaving my house means running into at least two people I know — and probably don’t want to catch up with — I’ve thoroughly enjoyed revisiting my favorite local coffee shop, getting a slice of pizza from my go-to Italian spot downtown and driving on roads that I can navigate like the back of my hand.
While experiencing my recently-accepted regression, I was surprised to notice signs that it’s actually not just me who has transformed — my hometown has, too. When walking around the downtown area of my small town, I realized that one of my favorite coffee shops had closed down. A pang hit my chest as I recounted the various study sessions, high school gossip and cups of creamy gelato I ate while there.
The new location was completely different — new staff, new seating arrangements and a different menu. Despite wanting to dislike the cafe, I enjoyed my experience with the plush new sofas and caramel brulee lattes.
While small, this change was a reminder that I can be grateful for all the past and present versions of both myself and my environment, while allowing them to evolve — and occasionally regress.
Perhaps hometown regression isn’t necessarily a bad thing in moderation. Embracing and recognizing the past versions of yourself is often one of the most productive ways to reflect on the ways you’ve grown. As my father once put it, peeking at the rearview mirror is a necessary part of driving, but you also have to keep your eyes on what’s coming up ahead.
Moving forward with this mindset as I prepare to return to Grounds next week, I will make it a point to carry on some elements of my hometown regression. I’ve realized that teenage me was right about a lot of things — like the simple pleasures of unabashedly getting lost in the process of writing a short story for fun or slowly tackling an absurdly large Lego set may be some of the greatest.
Rather than abandoning my hobbies or creative pursuits in lieu of more productive activities, I will make it a point to carve out time for my hobbies upon my return to the University. By being intentional about the times in which I am doing schoolwork or working, I hope to counter the pre-emptive burnout that usually hits me shortly before I need to start preparing for finals season. This intentionality is crucial to my overall well-being, and will allow me to show up as the best version of myself on Grounds.
More importantly, I want to keep up with some aspects of my hometown life — whether it be trying to send a text or two to my hometown friends or switching up my Saxbys order to my favorite coffee drink in high school. Reconnecting with these past versions of myself has allowed me to feel a greater connection to the growth I’ve undergone. I won’t miss making awkward small talk in the cereal aisle with a former classmate, but I will cherish certain aspects of my time back at home. Rather than being scared of the monsters of hometown horrors, I’ve decided to bring some of them along to finish up the semester.
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