Throughout the tedious writer’s strike, the dog days of summer when all the big budget releases had gone and the letdowns for fall television, only one thing this year has been consistently entertaining. Of course, we’re talking about the 2008 presidential election. It’s been so full of twists and turns that all the writers of Lost, Desperate Housewives, and Gossip Girl combined would not be able to come up with something as soap-operatic as this election. It has been every writer’s dream, and in honor of it, tableau has taken the time to hand out awards to the candidates, their running mates and everyone in between for the best and worst moments of the past 11-plus months.
Best Sob Story: Back in early January, conveniently before the New Hampshire primary, Hillary Clinton broke down in tears during a question-and-answer segment in which she described her fears for the country. The inner softie in all of us sympathized with her, while the cynic howled in laughter at what seemed to be one of the most desperate and calculated displays of emotion of all time.
Most with the Trends: While he may have been wearing them while we were all still in preschool, Joe Biden’s penchant for classic Ray-Ban Aviators shows he would fit right in strolling along the Lawn here on Grounds.
Most Ridiculous Obama Pal: It is safe to say that the Democratic nominee has not always made the best decisions when it comes to his friends, but his contact with the Reverend Jeremiah Wright gets the award for the biggest eye-raiser. YouTube one of the reverend’s many sermons and allow your mouth to drop as he spouts some decidedly anti-American rhetoric. Luckily for Obama’s numbers, Americans decided to roll their eyes on that one.
Most Questionable McCain Pal: John McCain has about 72 sets of odds stacked against him, but his biggest obstacle is President George W. Bush. In 2007 McCain and Bush shared the same opinion on legislation 95 percent of the time. Considering how things have turned out during Bush’s term, their ties makes for quite the head-scratcher when it comes to McCain’s own policies.
Best Regular Joe: “Joe the Plumber,” of course! This regular dude was transformed into a national star overnight when he became a recurring subject in the third presidential debate, and was even skewered on SNL.
Greatest Beauty Queen Moment: Katie Couric is not the most intimidating interviewer, so why Republican vice-presidential nominee Sarah Palin ended up sounding more like the infamous Miss Teen South Carolina than a future leader of America when asked about the recent $700 billion bailout is beyond is us.
Most Boring Celebrity Endorsement: Oprah Winfrey’s endorsement of Barack Obama was utterly predictable, delivered without much spark and hardly worthy of the attention it received.
Funniest Celebrity Endorsement: Although not an official endorsement, Paris Hilton’s response to John McCain’s ad linking Hilton’s celebrity to Obama’s popularity was the most entertaining and hilarious thing she’s ever put her name to and slammed McCain in favor of Obama in the process.
Best Sarah Palin Moment: While Tina Fey gets a lot of buzz for her spot-on impersonation, let’s not forget the reason Palin became the star she is. At the Republican National Convention, Palin delivered her speech with more gusto than a number of Oscar-winning performances. Palin captured the nation’s eye, and love her or hate her, she hasn’t let us blink since.
Show We’ll Never Watch Again After the Election: We’ll be tuning in to The Daily Show, The Colbert Report and even SNL occasionally once the election is over; however, we hereby swear off any YouTube-ing of The View to see what the four unintentionally hilarious ladies think of daily political events after Nov. 5 or 6... OK, give us the week, their arguments are a riot!
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