Parents and pamphlets can only be so informative about first-year essentials. Luckily, I have some life-saving, commonly forgotten tips — no college counselor could match my expertise. What do you do when it’s been a long night and your stomach is rumbling for grub to soak up the night’s mistakes? Head to Sheetz, obviously.
So you get to the exciting touch-screen menu, which seems like a fun game with the prize being delectable snacks. But how do you win this game? Your eyes are glazing over and the enticing pictures on the screen have you craving options you didn’t know existed. How does one walk out of Sheetz with a full heart, stomach and wallet? Don’t stress — I’ve got the cheat codes even Honor would approve of. Your mom may have taught you how to make your bed and take care of your sheets, but what about the Sheetz that truly matter?
The first challenge is figuring out what you want. If you’re coming back from a night out, your stomach is already filled with liquid. But if you’re stopping in between classes for a quick fix, their specialty drinks are ideal. I personally love their cold brew for its $3 price. You might feel tempted to be healthy and order a smoothie, but that’s basically like going to White Spot because you want a salad. If you’re going to overload on sugar from Sheetz, you might as well go full-out and order a fluffernutter shake. The combination of peanut butter, marshmallow and chocolate is more comforting than any care package your parents might send you.
Maybe it is one of those late nights where the only thing that can revive you is the Sheetz made-to-order menu. I have a two-word remedy that will cure any hanger — Appz. Sampler. For just $5 you can select three fried appetizers. For the indecisive, this is absolutely ideal. If you’re trying to watch your health from late-night eats, how bad could this be? I mean it’s only a sampler. It’s hardly a meal. It’s the perfect amount of food to satiate your shambly self but also prevent yourself from overeating.
If you get the appz sampler, there is no way you can walk out without mac ’n cheese bites. Honestly, you could select them for all three of your appetizer choices, and I wouldn’t judge. But if you want a variety, I also recommend the boneless bites, onion rings or jalapeno poppers. You’ve gotta get your money’s worth, so don’t get mac ’n cheese bites, Wisconsin cheese curds and mozzarella bites because essentially they’re all just fried cheese. The same goes for getting boneless bites and popcorn chicken together. Why are you limiting yourself on the types of fried goodness?
Maybe your stomach is ravenous, and it’s a cheat day. Substantial cheat codes are needed before your hangry self orders every item on the menu. Trust me, it happens. I’ve heard horror stories about people ordering $50-plus meals and never even receiving them because they get too tired to wait. You don’t want to be that person. It’s more disappointing than forgetting your first college assignment is due. To avoid this predicament, go for the meal deal. For $5 or less, you can get a sandwich with Fryz and a fountain drink. The meatball sub will definitely get you the most bang for your buck with this order. By sticking to a meal deal, your order will be fast and filling.
If your courageous brain strives to express some creativity, then you might be in the mood to make your own order. While this is fun, you must take precautions. I’ve had a friend practice this bravery and leave feeling defeated — she opened some form of a meat sandwich that had an unwanted sauce in it. To avoid this, you need a game plan. I recommend going for the quesarito — it feels exciting and bold, as it is a burrito made from a quesadilla. But the made-to-order choices for the fillings are all safe bets. You can select various Mexamerican fillings, but avoid the tempting offer to “wrap some totz in your burrito” at the end. Your overtired brain may think this is the work of a creative genius, but trust me, your stomach will not agree.
First-year advice — skip Crossroads and stop at Sheetz on your walk home to dorms. While “Croads” may have “free” food, Sheetz satisfies hunger like no other. Not only is its grease ideal for late-night munchies, it’s satisfying in the daylight too. You won’t catch me at White Spot, Christian’s or Crossroads in the bright of the day ever. But I will proudly waltz into Sheetz to grab some mac ‘n cheese bites when when my stressed self or wallet needs a break. Learn how to navigate the Sheetz menu effectively and you’re set to thrive.