The storied teacher-student relationship: One professor described it right here in The Cavalier Daily as "the vital humanism of academic life." While lust may be an intrinsic part of human nature, when we say "office hours," we don't mean "Oval Office hours."
College is unique in how close students get with their teachers. We're at that age when we consider ourselves intellectual equals to everyone and anyone. In high school, students hardly paid attention to the staff, but in college it isn't unusual to take a professor out to lunch. On occasion, however, these boundaries are brought into question -- how close is too close?
Usually, it isn't a problem to keep this relationship entirely asexual -- if, for example, the professor is bald, Republican and spends his weekends playing bingo. But, when your foreign TA struts in on the first day of class like someone from the cover of "GQ," it's hard not to notice. Is this so wrong? I mean, we are supposed to pay attention to our teachers. Plus, how else can I get motivated to get to that 8 a.m. European history discussion?
When a little lust turns into infatuation, or worse, the embodiment of "a vital humanism of academic life," it's hard to take the academic experience seriously. There is very little that can be romantic about this relationship, unless you're reading the unrealistically chaste accounts that Jo had with her mentor in "Little Women."
The more likely scenario would probably be like something out of "Cruel Intentions" exemplified by the intentionally aloof and tantric relationship with the music instructor.
Imagine the horror after you let that slip the next time you're drunk. Or worse, fending off his increasing advances as your interest tapers off. Then the most sickening part: when he asks you which gift he should give his wife for their anniversary. Suddenly, that elusive ideal of bliss with an older and more "mature" man loses its luster.
Authority is enticing, for sure. I definitely have had my fair share of teacher crushes, but when it comes down to it, there is a time and a place for acting out the kinky authority roles ... and that time and place should probably not fall on Monday, Wednesday and Friday afternoons from 3 to 3:50. Rather, it should come at 3:55 after you get your exam back.
No, seriously, the teacher-student relationship is a fantastic fantasy that is kept best at that -- a fantasy.
As a University, we have pride in the amount of voluntary honor upheld by the student body. Engaging in sexual activity with a teacher incubates the very bias that the honor code's strict ban on cheating is supposed to combat. It is pretty unfair that a great rack could land you a higher GPA, although I don't think I'll be hearing the guys complaining about girls wearing revealing outfits any time soon.
College is what you make of it, and the education should be valued. The fruit of your labor should not have anything to do with your killer sun-kissed mid-drift. Why spend anytime in the library if grades are so superficial? You might as well get your As in the gym.
Thomas Jefferson explored relationships with the potential for coercion and came to an interesting conclusion: "The commerce between master [teacher] and slave [student] is a perpetual exercise of the most boisterous passions, the most unremitting despotism on the one part, and degrading submissions on the other."
So at Mr. Jefferson's University, you can do as Jefferson said, or do as he did. Your sordid choice.
Kate Carlisle is a Cavalier Daily Health & Sexuality columnist. She can be reached at kate@cavalierdaily.com.
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