The most common complaint that I hear at U.Va. (and admit to making myself) is “there are not enough hours in the day.” It’s a fair statement to say that most students come here are quite well-rounded. In high school we all put in our dues of academics, sports, community service, leadership roles and internships.
Then, we come here and do the same thing. I started my first year rather overwhelmed since I refused to take an introductory level course. They seemed much too general for my taste — at that time, classes like sociolinguistics seemed a much better fit. But oh, and how wrong I was! I spent unnecessary hours deciphering and dissecting reading at the bottom of Clemons well past midnight.
On top of the rigorous academic schedule I made for myself, I piled on the extracurricular activities. The Fall Activities Fair is one of the deadliest U.Va. traditions, because your first reaction after leaving high school is to literally “join everything.”
As I walked down the aisles of CIO offerings, I started to think “Frisbee could be fun! The new reinvented ‘college’ me is super interested in recycling; but, I also should have something in student government. I mean, I never got the chance to be student body president in high school. It’s finally my chance to show what I’ve got.”
A magazine, an academic council, and three CIOs later, I scheduled in two hours per day for meetings.
Then, there’s our social life. Thursday hits this school, and the madness begins. All hope of a weekend to myself quickly resigns to hanging out with the friends I’ve made or the friends I want to make. This apartment pre-game, that sports game, this movie, that birthday dinner downtown. It’s exhausting.
I don’t have many complaints on how I’ve spent my time the last four years. I have met some people I plan to keep in my life forever if they’ll have me. The one piece of advice I can give for your sanity is to take time for yourself.
Some of the best moments I’ve had in charming Charlottesville include walking alone to the Downtown Mall, stopping in a coffee shop, and reflecting or walking in the rain to sit on one of the armchairs in Alderman Cafe and to look at the details of the high ceilings. I didn’t really learn just how much I needed that time until after my fourth semester here.
I often find myself wishing I really understood how I could have really used that time. There were so many resolutions I had made for myself after leaving high school, and there were so many patterns I intended to break. But it’s nearly impossible to break those patterns and reach those goals if you don’t give yourself the proper time to do so.
So whether it’s a workout regimen or a general appreciation toward yourself — thanking yourself for the good qualities and retraining yourself to change the bad ones — that time is now. It’s easy to assume after college, the madness will end, and those hours I spent at Alderman and Trinity could be used for something productive; but we do fill our schedules — we add unnecessary stresses, because we live in a kind of a society that values productivity and initiative, but neglects reflection (unless its for an A in EDLF). So be involved, be social, be driven but figure out yourself on your own terms, too.
Nabilah Jiwani is a fourth-year trustee.
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