Editor’s note: This article is a humor column.
As I return for my final year of college, I find myself reflecting on my past spring semester abroad in Paree. If you didn’t know, that’s how we pronounce “Paris” over in the land of bagets and kwasohns. Specifically, I’ve reflected on how difficult my return to normal life was, as well as all that I encountered over in the east … west? South? Honestly, I don’t remember, but that’s not important.
People keep asking if I would recommend studying abroad, and truthfully, I’m not sure. I mean, yeah, I got to spend four months in a foreign country speaking English with the same 15 Americans I already knew from the University. They were an amazing four months of seeing the world through an objectively excessive amount of Ryanair flights. However, I’ve come to realize that maybe it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. And maybe, just maybe, the great metropolis of Charlottesville, Virginia, already contains whatever it is that I sought abroad.
Luckily, you may not have to waste that precious semester to find out for yourself — you can learn from my experience. Here are five compelling reasons why you should think twice before leaving Charlottesville.
1. You can experience international social life in Charlottesville
The University student body is composed of diverse perspectives, but if there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s that the sole reason to study abroad is to experience international nightlife. Fortunately, you can get the same experience without ever leaving.
Picture this — it’s 11 p.m. on a Friday night, and you and your friends are rolling Gamma Ray Delta. However, you lose them almost immediately, and the sticky floors, dim lighting and 2010s banger rattling your eardrums are too much to handle. This experience is not unlike that of a night in Kapital or Berghain. You get the same sense of disorientation, cultural confusion and desperate search for someone you recognize — all without needing a passport or legitimate form of identification.
Amid the sea of seemingly identical Rhoback polos and flip-flops in 30-degree weather, you will meet students from all over — Fairfax, Arlington, Alexandria, Falls Church and McLean. And, if you’re particularly fortunate, maybe even someone from Richmond. Look no further for evidence that the University is a melting pot of cultures.
2. You can adopt new, chic lingo without going anywhere
One of the most valuable things I learned abroad was the French language. For example, I now say “bonjour” instead of “hello,” “merci” instead of “thank you” and “café” with a slightly different emphasis. Although I may not be able to hold any sort of conversation in French, I can tell you my semester abroad was “très bien.”
You can do this too. Simply pick a European country — even one that speaks English — and start incorporating its words into your everyday speech. Your sausage, egg and cheese bagel order from Bodo’s is now a “breakfast pastry.” Refer to your apartment at Grandmarc as your “flat” and your drive home on I-64 for fall break as “going on holiday.” If they look confused, explain that you “just got used to saying it abroad.” That last bit is especially effective when talking to people who did not ask.
3. You can acquire European habits locally
One of the biggest benefits of studying abroad is discovering foreign hobbies. Fortunately, there is no reason you can’t develop them right here.
There was something so effortlessly classy about how casually people smoked cigarettes outside of cafés in Europe. Fortunately, with the rise in wildfires, you can achieve equivalent amounts of lung damage right here in Charlottesville. Why travel to the Pantheon when you can inhale Canadian wildfire smoke outside the Rotunda?
And smoking isn’t the only European habit you can pick up locally. Drink an overpriced espresso at Grit, sit at Saxby’s for three hours doing absolutely nothing and start calling dinner at 6:30 p.m. “way too early.” No traveling necessary.
4. You can experience European walking culture in Charlottesville
Being abroad also taught me to appreciate walking. I’ve become the kind of person who will proudly say, “It’s only a 45-minute walk,” as if that is a normal amount of time to spend getting anywhere. Luckily, Charlottesville is extremely walkable. You can walk to class, you can walk to the Corner and, if you’re feeling particularly adventurous, you can walk to another class. One of the best University walking experiences is when it snows and certain sidewalks never get cleared, because you get to play a fun little ice skating game called “Will I make it back to my dorm?” European infrastructure cannot hold a candle to ours.
And if you want a little Italian flair, just walk across the Corner while an e-scooter comes barreling toward you at 25 miles per hour. It’s basically the same as getting flattened by a Vespa in Rome.
5. You’ll realize you have to go back to real life at the end
The worst part about studying abroad is coming home. Instead of spontaneous weekend trips to Spain and Italy, your weekends now consist of attempting to lock in at Shannon and finding ways to avoid submitting your Cavalier Daily draft. Instead of wondering whether you’ll make your 9 a.m. in Madrid, you’re wondering whether you’ll make your 9 a.m. at all.
You’ll have to balance the fine line of not becoming too insufferable upon returning, which most people are unable to achieve, but I think I’ve managed to avoid. I’ve only mentioned studying abroad approximately 1,582 times, which is honestly pretty impressive considering I was gone for four months.
Anyway, did I ever tell you about this little café near the Louvre where I had the best espresso?
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