A few days ago, as I waited for an ice coffee at Grit coffee on Elliewood, I couldn’t help but notice that a girl sitting on the counter was engrossed in a podcast series called “How to Do Everything.” After a quick search on iTunes, it turned out the series comprised various “how-to” episodes on everything from “how to find a date, to how to find water in the desert,” the idea being that, with the right instructions, we can learn — and succeed — at anything alone. This notion is incorrigibly flawed, and feeds the damagingly negative assumption that seeking help belies weakness, and this frailty translates into failure as an individual. It does not, and we must realize and voice the fact that we cannot, and should not, do everything — particularly when it comes to treating anxiety and mental illness.
Last week marked the beginning of the University-sponsored National Suicide Prevention Week, with a host of activities geared toward catalyzing conversations on mental health in order to undermine the unfortunate yet still prevalent taboo on discussing mental illness, and to advertise the availability of psychological resources on Grounds that can support struggling students.
The topics of suicide and mental health among college students have dominated discourse for the past few years. The focus is not necessarily due to a dramatic rise in the suicide rate for college students: in fact, the frequency of suicide for those aged 15-24 is still considerably lower than for other age groups. Rather, the suicide of college students has become more visible — nationally — with the advent of technology and social media, which, ironically, likely play a not insignificant role in exacerbating the social anxiety that may trigger pre-existing depressive proclivities among the student population.
An increased focus on the factors that may contribute to self-harm have yielded few concrete conclusions but for the fact that students who receive help from counseling centers are far less likely to commit suicide than those who don’t. This may seem obvious, but it points to a situation wherein there are students who need help, and help is readily available, yet the connection is never made; in order to get help, one must seek it. And to seek help is to concede you need it, which violates the acutely individualistic and voraciously ambitious culture pervasive in large, renowned American universities, and even, to a certain extent, in society: the “self-help” industry generates over $11 billion dollars per year, underscoring the preeminence of the deleterious notion that we can (and should) do everything by ourselves.
So, students cope, each in their own ineffective way. Some overload, on extracurricular activities or classes, in an attempt to sublimate crushing anxiety into small areas — outside their heads — where they feel we can take control, or inject some semblance of purpose which may otherwise be lacking. Kathryn DeWitt, a Penn student recently profiled by The New York Times in a long piece on mental illness in universities, told the paper she constantly contended with the “[unbearable] pain of being less than what she thought she ought to be,” working herself to the bone in order to attempt to take advantage of all opportunities.
And what opportunities there are! An almost infinite list of classes to take, societies to join, projects to initiate, scholarships to apply for, workshops to participate in. . . and yet we cannot do everything. Ultimately, “hyperachievement” is counterproductive, exhausting, unfulfilling and certainly no cure for anxiety or depression. Life is only chance and choice, compromise is inevitable and the consciousness of priority is fundamental to constructing your self and building your life, that is, what fills your day-to-day existence. We must be able to recognize we need other people, to do the things we cannot, both for ourselves and for society at large.
Tamar Ziff is a Viewpoint writer.
Read More
ONIBUDO AND SAWAYA: Police, not students, were agents of chaos
By Naima Sawaya and Nathan Onibudo | 2 days agoSaturday, the state, not students nor protesters, brought violence to this campus.
IYER: Sports stadiums should sport more benefit to Virginia residents
By Arjun Iyer | 5 days agoPast stadiums in other states show that Virginia has the potential to succeed at such a construction project, provided that proper measures are undertaken.
KURTZWEIL: True financial aid must be transparent
By Paul Kurtzweil | April 29, 2024The implications and revelations of the lawsuit should inspire greater transparency at the University in order to ensure that financial aid is properly and equitably distributed.
