The Cavalier Daily
Serving the University Community Since 1890

How I landed dinner with Sullivan

Why simply asking might surprise you

It may have started as a joke, but there was nothing funny about President Teresa Sullivan walking through the door of our apartment. Well, maybe it was slightly comical. It’s not every day the president of the University goes to a student’s apartment for a three-course meal.

Though we had laughed about it all fall, it wasn’t until the beginning of this semester that we actually sat down and wrote Sullivan a note inviting her over for dinner. After signing the card and gracing the side of it with a sketch of the Rotunda, we slipped it in the mail without any expectations. It came as a pleasant surprise, then, that a couple weeks later we received an email informing us that Sullivan would “embrace the opportunity” to dine with us.

This past week, as we counted down the minutes to her arrival, the butterflies in my stomach almost convinced me it was a first date. I had no idea what to expect, and to be quite frank, I was nervous. My worries turned out to be needless, however, because from start to finish the conversation flowed naturally, winding through academic discussions, personal stories and anything else that popped into our heads. My friend Ben asked his burning question — her favorite type of music — and discovered she has a deep appreciation for Mozart, and she quenched my curiosity by telling us the story of how she and her husband first met. After two hours of good food and even better tea, it was finally time to bid adieu, and Sullivan headed back to Carr’s Hill.

I was still in disbelief as I munched on the brownies that she had brought as a hostess gift. We had just hosted the president of the University for dinner, and all we had done was ask. Life can’t be that easy, right? As I kept thinking, however, I realized that perhaps it is.

A few weeks ago, my friend Mary embarked on a mission. Each and every day, she went out of her way to ask for something she normally wouldn’t. Most requests — like simply asking for an “A” on a paper — were pipe dreams, yet she still received a stunning number of yeses in response. Mary’s favorite story involved going to café and inquiring about the price of a yogurt. After learning it cost $4, she asked the cashier if there was any way she could get it for less. Next thing she knew, she was walking out of the café with a free yogurt.

In life, I’ve often found myself biting back a question on the tip of my tongue solely for fear of the unknown — the response. We’ve all been told by a parent, a friend or by ourselves that the worst they can say is no. I disagree. In my opinion, the worst thing that can befall you is not a rejection from others, but rather a failure to give yourself a chance.

By refraining from asking questions, we are writing conclusions to short stories that easily could have developed into novels. Though receiving a free yogurt or dining with Teresa Sullivan may not be everyone’s grandest aspiration, these small occurrences are emblematic of the endless number of opportunities at our fingertips, if only we asked for them. This is not to say when we ask for something we should automatically expect it to be given to us — that is a recipe for disaster. But it is important to give ourselves a chance.

To this point, my college experience has been comprised of moments both monotonous and extraordinary. Though the monotony is largely unavoidable — acquiring 120 college credits does require at least some amount of homework — many of the extraordinary moments have stemmed from questions and suggestions I never thought would come to fruition, a list which now includes dinner with President Sullivan.

Though quite an old adage, an alumnus recently told me he doesn’t regret any of the things he did at college — he only regrets the ones he didn’t. It’s a shame to think that every day we let so many opportunities slip through our fingers even though they’re often just a question away.

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