Editor’s Note: This article is a humor column.
This Tuesday, the Board of Visitors’ Buildings and Grounds Committee announced its four-year plan to renovate the majority of first-year on-Grounds housing, intending to make first-year living more highbrow per rising competition in the Charlottesville housing market. Renovations are set to begin as early as the 2026-27 academic year, and the announcement has raised many questions and concerns among incoming first-years, the current student body, faculty and Charlottesville locals.
The project, titled Blossom on Alderman, is set to revamp the dorms on Alderman Road, including all hall-style buildings, suite-style buildings and Gooch/Dillard. While the University plans to maintain both hall-style and suite-style dorms, the appearance of the dorms and the amenities included are to change completely. Rumored changes include marble flooring in each double or suite, heated toilet seats in bathrooms and a Grit Coffee bar for each hall. Renovated rooftop spaces will include hot yoga studios, hot tubs and spas. With these recreational additions, students will be free to apply for new paid positions, such as “spa water formulator" or “bungee fitness instructor.”
The Committee claims that the seemingly costly renovations will make no direct impact on the cost of attendance, but concerned students cite recent increases in tuition across schools as “suspicious” and potentially a means of funding the project. Committee Chair Ivy Bloom made a statement following the backlash.
“I don’t really understand why everyone is so up in arms about the whole thing,” Bloom said. “One day students are upset about the quality of on-Grounds housing, and the next, they resist the improvements we want to implement. Whatever they say, I think everyone knows it was about time Gooch/Dillard got a lip flip, some botox and a bit of lipo. It wasn’t too long ago we finished renovations on the McCormick Road housing — dorms on Alderman deserve some love, too. Make old dorms old again!”
Many speculate that Blossom on Alderman was an eleventh-hour decision by the University in response to the increasingly competitive and luxurious housing market in Charlottesville. With the slew of questions and criticisms online, current and incoming Resident Advisors and Senior Residents have taken on ambassador positions — “Blossom Ambassadors” — for Housing and Residence Life social media, posting informational videos about what to expect for Blossom on Alderman. Lead Ambassador and SR Minnie Malist shared a post on HRL socials.
“The renovations spearheaded by the Committee are long overdue and necessary,” Malist said in the post. “Students deserve the best quality housing the University can provide. Yes, that may mean that a portion of first-years will be temporarily unhoused, and the housing market will be even more unstable in Charlottesville, but this project is about the long term. Just wait until you can brag about being at the top of Niche’s ‘Best College Dorms in America!’”
While residence staff are excited to promote the project, feelings among incoming first-years are not as positive. Incoming first-year Engineering student Grant Mark expressed concerns about whether the construction would impact the guarantee of housing for his first year at the University.
“My mom sent an angry email to the University when she heard about the whole thing,” Mark said. “It bounced back a few times, but when she finally got a response, they said that they’re ‘going full force with the renovations and closing all dorms for the school year.’ My roommate and I are getting nervous about whether we’ll actually be able to live on Grounds. It’s gotten so nerve-wracking that we even considered applying to live in Brown College just to make sure we have somewhere to stay. Desperate times.”
The upset about Blossom is not limited to the study body, with even U.Va. Dine expressing concerns about the changes. With other planned renovations including complete overhauls of communal kitchens and the addition of gourmet, Erewhon-esque grocers along Alderman Road, U.Va. Dine staff fear that students will come to the dining halls even less. Member of the Observatory Hill Dining Hall staff Cricket Inmaomlet expressed her worries.
“Right now, students only find themselves in O’Hill once they’ve blown through their dining dollars anyway,” Inmaomlet said. “Sure, the students still have to pay for their unlimited meal plan, but morale will certainly be lower without students coming to eat the food. This is gonna ruin the tour. The ‘Worldwide Food Tour’ themed night, that is.”
The final addition explicitly detailed in the announcement was the construction of a Sugared and Bronzed tanning studio in the middle of the O’Hill field. Although critics pointed out that first-years already lay out on the field during the warmer months and there is absolutely no need for a tanning studio on Grounds, the Committee claims that the studio is a way for students to “get their tan on” during the colder months and combat seasonal depression.
As the University community awaits more details about Blossom on Alderman, some wonder what other ways the University could attempt to create more “luxury” for students in the coming years. When asked whether she has heard about plans outside of Blossom on Alderman, Bloom was quite evasive.
“I’m only concerned with the Alderman renovations,” Bloom said. “Regardless of what other groups on Grounds are planning for future Hoos, I think people need to stop worrying about it and just accept that our University is evolving. Either way, if one day U.Va. Dine started giving students the same meal exchange options as they do at High Point University, it’s not like anyone would be complaining.”
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